#WishICouldTellYou {Feelings Of Beating Heart}

1.

"you make me want to be nice again. Be good and kind. Isn't that something Ananth?" she said caressing my hair with her hand while I lay on the hospital bed announced being in coma for last 7 months. She has been coming to visit me every Wednesday.

I know I love her and she loves me, but I fear what will happen if these 7 months become 7 year, I fear what will happen after 7 days, what if she stopped coming to visit me. I don't think time will stay still for me, just because I love her, I should not cripple her by my condition. I cant function my body and brain or feel but despite me being in coma, I still can see and hear everything, none of them know that.

Then suddenly the doctor came in the room and said "Ms. Anusha there's a good news but," before he could finish the sentence she bombarded him with questions and a very bright smile was evident on her face, which is something that I fell in love with.

But my thoughts get interrupted by the doctor's words "he can come back from the coma by some medical therapies and experiment but there's a high chance of him losing his last 2 years of memories."

I couldn't move but I feel like I am crushed under boulders of emotion which can get erased totally from me. I will be ripped apart from all the good moments I ever had with her.

I feel like even in this state of mine she can see what I feel because she looked back at me for once and she nodded for the doctor to leave us alone.

She sat down beside my bed, took my hand in hers, squeezed it a bit and looked me in eyes, I wish I could tell her that I know! I know and I can't live everyday, knowing that I don't remember 2 years of my life. There will always be a hole in my heart and my soul. I don't want to live anymore knowing I will forget her.

"you know Ananth, I never thought that via a social helping website I will get to know the most beautiful person in the whole world. But here we are, I know you will forget me soon enough, I know I should be sad but I'm not, you know why, I have been hoping, waiting and praying everyday for you to wake up. I have not been the best influence on you but I promise I will make you remember me, I will show you our old pics," in midst a single teardrop fell from her eyes, "I will make journals and I will remind you, of how much I love you." At this point she cant stop her tears, then suddenly everything goes dark and numb.

*she heard that quiet beeping sound in the ECG monitor and Ananth's heart stops for forever*