If not us, who? If not now, when? | Muke Clemmings

Chapter 9

Song ideas for this part:
- Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran
- Do I Wanna Know - Arctic Monkeys

Karen went out. She sighed a bit with ease.

"How is Mikey?", I stood in front of her.
"H-", doctor came, interruptid her. He sighed, definitely bored, like his hands were full of kids and their funny problems: "Luke Hemmings?"
What is happening? I was completely clueless, "Um...It's me?"
"Michael wants to see you. 3 minutes.", he apologized and went down the hallway.
I came in his room with no words.
"Mikey?", he smiled from the deepest place of his heart, in respond: "Come here bro."
"Why did you want to see me?", I was worried althought there was surely nothing that serious.
"Well...I...I just wanted to hang a bit more with you...", he was holding my hand tight while smiling weakly and got lost in his thoughts... I think he didn't really wanted to talk with me...He just wanted me to be right beside him... And since then... A lot of feelings started haunting me and I really can't explain what was I feeling...

Michael's POV
I was looking at Luke and my heart was melting...I wanted to tell him so badly that I.... I love him....that I need him.... But... I can't... I didn't wanted to ruin our careers or, first of all, our friendship just because I have a stupid little crush on him... Repeat Michael: Little crush! That's nothing special! It's just a moment of weakness...
I could lie to myself once...twice...but... my heart knows the truth. And the truth is that I want to feel Luke's beautiful soft lips. I wanted to feel his piercing cooling me while we are making out.. But... all I will ever get is this - holding his hand...
Doctor came in the room and told Luke to go out... He promised me he will be in front of the room if I need something...I didn't wanted to be a burden to the lads.... I told him to go home and take a nap but...he wouldn't listen me... You never do Luke....You smiled at me while exiting the door... He is trying to protect me from everything, but actually, he's the one who's unintentionally killing me.

I got out of Michael's room still feeling too much shit round my body. Karen saw my confused face and asked me slowly: "Why did he wanted you to go over there?"
"Well...um....actually....he just wanted to see me.", I smiled weakly, feeling awkward for some reason.
Karen looked at me like she is not really sure is that the truth but she just nodded slowly.
"Hows Mikey?", Ashton was copletely worried.
"He...He will be okay...", I wanted to believe in my words but... in his eyes I saw pain...
"Are you okay?", Guys please stop asking me questions, I thought.
"Yes, yes, everything's fine! Why are you asking?", I sighed.
"Maybe you should just-", Calum started almost begging me.
"No Cal, I'm fine. I don't want to go home.", I rolled my eyes.
Ashton saw doctor and asked him something but I couldn't hear, he was too far so I decided not to pay too much attention. I closed my eyes and sighed. I really felt strange...My heart was breaking into million pieces and I didn't know why. I couldn't help it... There was just something about Michael that was destroying me...
Ashton came to Karen and me: "I asked the doctor about the psychiatrist and things... He told me that he can start his therapy even today. Karen?"
Karen closed her eyes and sighed like she was breaking... Like her life and everything she built was collapsing like a house of cards. And I couldn't help her. I couldn't help Michael... I was feeling so poor and weak... "If the doctor thinks that's what he needs to do....Then who am I to go against it?"
Ashton started fighting with words: "So...um...we will go to a private one... because... um... I think Michael would feel even worse if this goes to public."
Karen sighed again. A small voice came out of her: "Okay..."
Ashton said he will be right back... He surely wanted to call some private psychiatrist.
"Mother Karen...", I must calm he down, I thought.
She looked at me with eyes full of tears.
"...don't...don't be sad... Michael... will be okay...", words were falling off my lips like they are stones...
"I.... I don't know Luke...Please, help my son...", she begged me.
"I...I will...", a huge lump was in my throat and I felt like I'm dying. I closed my eyes and threw my head back, getting a small headache, I didn't know how to help Michael but I must help him...

ღAuthors noteღ
HAVE YOU HEARD LIVESOS?! THAT LIVE ALBUM WILL BE THE DEATH TO MEH.