Diary of 'the quiet girl in the back'

Entry 1

dear diary,
mom got me a diary, she said i needed to "express myself" don't know what that means but i'll be okay. tomorrow's the first day of 7th grade, where i live 6th grade is still elementary school. i'm kinda nervous, but let's hope it'll go good, but since the whole point of a diary is to let it all out? that's what google search is saying. I've never had a diary before so i really don't know what to do with you. i'm guessing i'm supposed to take yOu to school, night as well there's not reason why not to. signing off for the night or hour? ~~ Daniella

daniella put her book down on the dresser and her black pen onto of it as she left her room doing her nighttime routine, eat , shower , take dog outside . After all that was done she just looked around, her mom asleep in her room same as her two older brothers as she knew tomorrow she'd wake up and already be getting yelled at for something simple as taking long in the bathroom, she wanted to escape her house but she just couldn't. Her eyes started to tear up as she tended to shake letting her dog in going into her room tears already falling as she picked up her diary starting to write.

~ 1 mintue later~
Yes i'm already back. i was just standing there and started to cry. I'm mentally not okay as you can say obviously, i'm not ready for tomorrow morning cause i already know my mom will get angry with me then after i walked away my brothers will gang up on me and i'll cry and just get called sensitive all over something so small and so simple. i don't wanna be in this world anymore. no i'm not afraid to die, but i'm afraid of living, my anxiety is like candle and times it could be a small spark in a lighter not wanting to go and at other times it could be a candle falling over onto oil making a whole house go up into flames ! i'm not okay yet whenever somebody ask i always say i'm fine cause i don't want any attention. looking at those girls in the magazine and how there body is just perfect and there faces just so perfectly perfect. ! my weight is the one thing that i hate ill be too skinny and then whenever i gain the weight i want and be happy with myself someone will go off calling me fat, it's like if i'm happy with myself no one else is all i want to do is be as perfect as the girls i see everywhere it's like the slim thicc skinny girls with blue eyes and blond hair and that are the only think the world wants from any female! and yet i can't give them that, what they'll get is a tan somewhat chubby girl with brown eyes and black hair and yet they all don't want that,! i try my best to be top of my classes and yet i always end up being one of the worst i'm trying to be the best version of myself yet i can't be i cant be the person everybody wants me to be i'm stuck in a house that makes me feel like straight crap i don't wanna be alive i wanna start over i want a new life a new everything yet i wont be selfish and kill myself . cause right like everyone says " WHY WOULD YOU KILL YOUSELF IF YOUR GIVIN EVERYTHING YOU WANT?!" YET I MAY BE GETTING EVERYTHING A KID COULD WANT YET I DONT HAVE THE HAPPINESS A KID MY AGE SHOULD BE HAVING, IM TOO YOUNG TO BE THIS SAD IM TOO YOUNG TO HAVE THIS MUCH ANXIETY IM JUSY TOO YOUNG!
~ dani!

she wiped her tears off her face throwing her book and pen to the ground shutting her room door locking her dog up and laid down into bed closing her eyes and cried herself to sleep not wanting the next day to come whatsoever hoping the next time she wakes up she's a newborn baby crying starting over with a brand new life.

(hey! okay so this story might be a little bit sad,, sorry! heh but i really hope you enjoy it im working on other story's so just ye enjoy~ author💕)