Secrets

Lost

She paced back and forth, looking up towards the door, and back down to the ground. She started to bite her nails, as she continued to pace. She stopped, took a deep breath, and proceeded up the stairs. She cautiously opened the door to the building  and quietly entered. Her footsteps blaring, every step, louder than the next. She hugged herself, tightly, "it's cold in here".. she thought. She arrived at the front lines of the NYPD. Suspected criminals in handcuffs, yanked at their shackles, trying to get free, and deafening sounds of innocent pleas flooded her ears. She covered them, closed her eyes and thought to herself, "I can't do this." She opened her eyes, skimmed the area, and spotted a uniformed police officer, he sat at the desk, typing rapidly, his eyes fixated on the computer screen. She could now hear the thunderous clicks of the computer's keyboard. She put more pressure on her covered ears to try to lessen the noise. It was too much. She closed her eyes again and took a deep breath to try to calm her rising anxiety. "Are you lost?" She jumped at the sound of the deep husky voice. "Can I help you Ma'am?" She slowly opened her eyes and uncovered her ears. "I"m s..sorry?" She stuttered. "Are you lost Ma"am?" "Do you need help with anything?" The man said with a hint of annoyance. She looked up at him, the man returned her glance with an impatient stare. She rapidly averted her gaze to the floor and slowly walked to the desk. "I....I would... lik..e to report...t a... uh.. rape" she stammered in a whisper while scratching her scalp. "I can't hear you Ma-am, you will have to speak louder?" The man bled with irritation now. She  looked up with a glare, licked the dryness from her lips and repeated through clinched teeth. "I.... would..d like to report a.... rape." She swallowed. The officer looked her up and down, and with bewilderment in his eyes and a hint of uncertainty , the officer dialed a number, murmured something to the person on the other end and hung up. "If you can please fill out this paperwork, a detective will be right with you." He held to her, a clipboard, with papers attached, and directed her to the sitting area. "Than..k you" she nodded. The officer quickly pulled away. She brushed off the officer's vexation, took the clipboard, and slowly started towards a seat. She sat down. She was quivering. Clutching the clipboard tightly to her chest, she took a deep breath, and gradually eased the shivering. Slowly, she laid the clipboard on her lap, she quickly flipped through the pages, skimming and scanning. She flipped back to the beginning, and silently read the first line on the first page. "First Name"... She wrote.. "Tris", "Last Name"... "Peers".

She finished filling out the necessary paperwork, stood up and started towards the desk. The officer adjusted his attention to her from the computer screen and quickly stated, "Just lay it there I'll take care of it." And motioned with his head for her to put the clipboard on the desk. "Um... how long will this take?" Tris inquired. The cop looked back at the computer screen, went back to typing and said "A few minutes, you can have a seat in the meantime." Tris slowly walked back to her seat. She sat. She bit her nails and tapped her leg ferociously. "I shouldn't have came here" Tris thought to herself. "They won't believe me." She ran her hand through her unkempt hair , pulled her coat tightly and got up from her seat. She approached the desk once more, "Where's the bathroom? " Tris asked the officer. Without even a glance towards her, he bellowed, "Round the corner to the left." Tris rolled here eyes and sluggishly proceeded towards the way the cop had directed. "So tired" Tris thought to herself. "I didn't realize how late it was." Tris' body, mind, and soul was depleted. She entered the bathroom and rapidly closed and locked the door. She rested onto the closed door and closed her eyes. It felt like eternity before Tris slowly pushed off the door and walked to the mirror. She stopped. She observed herself. Her thick black curly hair disheveled, her amber colored eyes red from days of crying, and sleepless nights. Her sun-kissed tanned skin drained of color. Again, tears began to form in her eyes. Tris walked closer to the mirror. Rested her hands on top of the sink, and said with a groan, "I'm a complete mess." She couldn't remember the last time she looked in the mirror or wanted to look for that matter. She gazed over herself. Looked down towards the sink. Turned the cold steel handle of the faucet, glanced up at the mirror again, and with a dejected sigh Tris uttered, "I'm so lost."