DEAD ROSES. CHANGLIX

sept.

the car ride home was painfully awkard. i sat between chan and changbin, of all people, in one of the vans, leaving my throat scracthy and stuffy once again. my heartbeat was beating far past my chest and i had trouble breathing properly, sweat dripping down my forehead, rolling downt he sides of my face. chan put his hand gently onto my knee, calming me slight, but this all wen to hell when changbin noticed and mimicked the action, but on my arm instead, nearly grabbing my hand. i turned to him with a warry smile.

"are you okay, lix?" he asked quietly, the nickname making me blush. i nodded, but he didn't take it. he never did. "if there' something going on, you know you can tell us, right?"

my gaze worriedly shifted to chan's. he looked down disappointedly, but he soon pulled out his phone. me, not being too nosy, i chose not question what he could be doing with it.

once we arrived at the dorms, everyone slowly made their way out of the van, besides chan and myself. i tried following behind changbin, but our leader had grabbed my hand, pulling me back into my seat. chan saluted the driver, telling him we'd be staying in for a while and asking for some time alone. the driver obliged calmly and got out, following the boys inside the building for some warmth.

"felix, i'm really worried about you." he started, not breaking eye contact, something he did often to keep our attention on him. "i did some research on the disease and the possible treatments, and i think i found something that could really help."

he paused for a moment, as if asking for my approval to continue.

i nodded slowly.

chan looked back down to his phone in his lap, flipping it in his hands. fidgeting with it to ease his own tension, i assumed. this only made me more anxious.

"chan?"

"you'll need a surgery."

"then i'll take it, if that means i'll get rid of-"
i was interrupted by my own coughing. this was most definitely the strongest it had ever been, multiple petals coming out of my mouth into the palms of my hands, feeling the rose thorns crawling up my throat with every jerk forward. i kept repeating the action, the older looking down at me in concern. i finally managed to whisper. "get rid of this."

"no felix, you don't understand."

i looked up to him, tears in my eyes. "what?"

"you'll lose your feelings for him."
---------------------------------------------------
genie's wish.
sometimes it's
easier getting
hurt than
letting yourself
get better.

word count; 426