I Don't Know How It Got This Way....

Chapter Four

-Kiara's POV-

Like normal, we did everything we do every morning. When we had cleaned up and showered, we headed out to pick up the vases.

The lights of the store were brilliant white, blinding almost. They made everything seem so sharp and clean. Everything seemed to have a place, all of the spectacular wedding items. Josh looked a little freaked out by how large this place was, but as soon as I wove our hands together, he calmed down. After venturing into the aisles, we found where the vases were located. Josh had picked up several boxes of them, doing all the heavy lifting until his phone rang. I only heard pieces of his conversation, but it didn't sound like he was happy. Maybe a random band practice or meeting? "Screw it Sara. Kiara will but- That's not fair! She's too damn sweet to you, you know that? Okay so what is it again- Oh okay. Kiara will know? Of course she will, she's brilliant. Sara, I didn't say that! Okay, fine." Josh hung up the phone in a daze, carefully walking over to me. "I just want to tell you that this wasn't my idea, hate Sara for it, please." Josh carefully said, tucking a couple of my ringlets behind my ear. "Okayyyyy. Spit it out, Josh!" I said laughing. " Sara wanted us to be paired up for the wedding and to make my family convinced that I'm not gay!" He rushed, frowning at me as I smiled at him. I simply nodded okay, trying my best not to laugh. What if he is gay?! "You aren't gay, right?" I asked quickly, panicking. Was I in love with a gay guy? "Nope, otherwise I wouldn't let you sleep with me every night." He says smirking down at me. I quickly look to the floor, at my black chucks. " Wouldn't it be the opposite? That you would let me?" I say, almost too fast, trying to take it back, knowing where this conversation leads.... "No, I know what I said."

　

"Okay, Mike's gonna babysit you to make sure you don't do anything extremely stupid. Sara's forcing Devyn and I to bond, I won't fill him in on any of the dirty games we play-" I cut Josh off before Devyn and Mike freak out. "Screw you." I say as he lifts me off the ground in a hug. "That's inappropriate. Not in front of people, Kiara." Josh laughs as I smack his shoulder angrily. My brother wearily looks at me, then at Josh then back at me. Mike just laughs, gently pulling me away from Josh's embrace. When I do let go, Josh appears fine, but when he takes off his sunglasses and places them in his hair, you can see the hurt in his glossy blue eyes. Josh heads for the door, and I catch his hand in mine. "See you soon, okay?" I say to Josh as he squeezes my hand before letting go.

　

Mike had made dinner and for once, didn't set anything on fire. "Okay, we made pancakes, and considering they actually don't taste like crap, we've done well!" I say laughing as Mike and I clear the table. "My cooking does not taste-" I cut him off in a burst of laughing. "Cooking?! You call pouring cereal in a bowl, cooking?!" We were laughing so hard, that by the time Josh got home, we were still rolling around laughing. Josh had his sunglasses perched on his head, with strands of sliver hair framing the black rimmed glasses. Mike and I had been chilling on the couch, but with all the laughter, we ended up in a heap on the floor.

"Seems like you guys had fun," Josh said, sitting down on the love seat placed directly next to us. "Devyn wasn't a jerk was he? Did he threaten you to back off? Or that you can't touch me?" A slur of questions came out, word vomit all over again. "No. We simply hung out at the bar, watched hockey or whatever." Josh says giving me a hand up. He pulls me next to him, leaving a giddy Mike on the floor. "He had like four beers, I felt so much like you, because I sat there and drank two bottles of water." Josh giggles, and I realize that he is so much like me. Mike got up and went to the kitchen to get himself a drink, and Josh flipped off the TV. Mike sat down next to me, and placed his glass of water down. "Does pouring water count as cooking?" Mike asked with a straight, pleading face. I burst out laughing, and Josh went ridged. He had been holding my hand, but then, as if my hand was on fire, he dropped it. I stopped laughing, and turned my attention to him. His blue eyes were glassy, his eyelashes like a porcelain dolls. His face was pale, no color whatsoever. His mouth was set into fine smooth lines, a sad sort of look. He looked so on edge, yet emotionless at the same time.

　

"Kiara, how about you come over tomorrow, at like, say one, when Josh is feeling better." Mike suggests. Before I could open my mouth to accept, Josh answers with a dead, cool tone. "She's busy. We're busy." Mikes head snaps around to Josh, who is sitting on his kitchen counter top. I give Josh a confused, misled look, when Mike gets up and goes for the door. "I can tell when I'm not wanted around, just wish you could've been a tad bit nicer about it." Mike's voice cracks, than shatters at the end. I put my head in my lap, and let my curls waterfall over my face, hiding the upset look that I have. I hear Josh get up and after a second, I feel him sit down next to me on the couch. He wraps his arm around me, not caring that he just broke one of my best friend's hearts. I rip his arm off of me, and set it down next to him. "Don't touch me." I whisper, a tear sliding down my face. I couldn't believe it. Josh had said he'd never hurt me, and here we are, not even on a speaking basis. I went to get up, and with my hair not acting like a curtain around my face anymore, he notices my tears. "Kiara...... I'm so-" I cut him off by running to his room.

I let myself fall on his bed, and curl around his pillow. My tears made little puddles on his pillow, and after a few minutes of my silent sobbing, I heard Josh coming in. I looked away from him at first, but then let my eyes travel to his face. His eyes were icy blue, his eyelashes framing them perfectly. He slowly walks over to the bed and sits on the edge closest to me, and rests his hand on my hair. "Why do you even care if Mike and I hang out?" I sob. "Because, he'll hurt you. He has Megan, and he's leading you on!" Josh yells, but then his voice goes soft again. "It's because I love you, and he can't make up his damn mind, but I can. I did. I chose you, over Amanda, over everything. I love you, Kiara, I really do."

- Josh's POV-

"Do you really?" Kiara asks in a small voice, pulling at a loose thread from her jeans. I take her hands, and look directly at her. "Yes, yes I really do. But I need to you to know that I'll always be here for you." I say, squeezing her hands tightly. "Okay, can you do something for me?" Kiara whispers, wiping away a tear. "Sure, anything you want." I reply. "Sing for me like you did the day I went to the hospital?" Kiara asks, cuddling closer to me. "What song?" I carefully say, since I know her pretty well, her response was obviously going to be something she hasn't heard me play live. "B Team?" She says with a smile on her face.

'You could want this See if it fits for a bit and if you don't like Then you can go, like you have been And I'll never tell how I fell for it I never fell before 3,2,1, you get right up and I'm the one done You never say yes, not quite no You say just enough to make not go You choose your words in careful voice But in the end I'm not the first choice You say you want someone just like me So then why am I your plan B

You know, you love the way I linger and You keep me wrapped right around your finger and You say just wait a little longer And in time I could be the right one Please, I'm the B Team'

I sang to a now sleeping Kiara. Her eyelashes brushed against her cheeks, and she had both arms wrapped around my waist. She opens her eyes and sleepily whispers "I love you." That was when I got a spike of confidence and finally, kissed her.