A Girl In A Nutshell

A Timeless Love

Sometimes I wish I can turn back the times when loving you felt right..
But, because of my selfish decisions & indecisiveness I'm stuck in the position wondering what if,
Maybe if I actually valued and cherished you I'd still have you..
I wouldn't have to look for YOU in other people, places, things .. man where the world can take you .. & then I find myself wishing,
Wishing there was still an us, but because of me there isn't you & then I wonder why,
Sometimes I find myself saying "I'm happy you found better", but then say "Better is me" ..
But would it have really been? I mean I was young, dumb, wild, free,
So you set me..
You taught me what it would be like to be without you.. should've known then you'd always be my missing person,
Now seeing you love another hurts..
I still can't believe I messed that up..
To see someone else look at you like I did, reminds me of how I wanted to look at you all the time..
Yes,
I admit I get jealous..
and no, I can't wrap my head around it,
it's always you that I wanted, so I looked for another..
Praying they had the same smile as you,
Hoping they'd make me laugh like you,
Or, even how you comforted me..
But there isn't ..
I let my person walk away from me & now there is someone loving you right,
On the right time, and as the clock ticks ..
I still wonder "WHAT IF" ..