"I thought I was doing a little better but i'm not, everything fucking hurts"
I read that on twitter, funny how midnight brings out the sadness inside of us. Do you ever just look in the mirror and stare at your reflection and see a completely different person? Have you ever tried falling asleep but you couldn't 'cause you were being chased by the monsters inside your freaking head? For once, have you tried asking yourself how tired are you these days? If you ever tried these, then you're not alone. I'M FUCKING LOST! I'M FUCKING LONELY! I'M FUCKING USELESS! I'M FUCKING DEPRESSED!
What's wrong with me really? Who's the one to blame? Is it the people around me? Or it was just my fucked up mind. Can somebody tell me what the hell should i do, 'cause at this point, i really don't know. It scares me how i slowly lose my will to live, and i'm not even kidding when i say that i'm at the verge now, where if things happen, so be it. There's no point in explaining, no point in figuring things out, just let it be. The hole inside of me gets bigger and wider each day that i couldn't even think of ways to fill it up. It really sucks to be me. Honestly, i couldn't remember the last time i was genuinely happy. I think the only genuine emotion i felt was hating everything and everyone else including me. I never thought it's possible to lose all my emotions. I feel so numb.
Nobody really cares until your broken and can't be fixed.
*****
The only thing that i'm free to do as an adult was lighting my cigarette, fuck it!
YOU ARE READING
Never Forget
Non-FictionI wanted to be heard but i couldn't find the right words to say. I write every time i feel like i was about to explode. All these unsaid emotions, those things that i should have said will be written here. I'm that scared, i don't have the courage t...
