Innocent Act of Evil

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"If you truly believe that all are born good, then explain why you're afraid of letting your demons show?" -Anonymous

Proven Guilty

I don't believe what I did was right however, I don't believe what I did was wrong. Do I deserve punishment? Well, that was for the jury to decide. Indeed, I killed a man with intent. Intent being was to stop his evil before said evil was carried out. I took a life to save one, to simply put. I'm still trying to piece together what happened. Whether I should've intervened or stood on the sidelines with everyone else in that courtroom. That evil man is damned eternally and I suppose I am as well, by God's will. I'm writing this not as a confession, but as an explanation.

-Stay Strong Pumpkin, Daddy Loves You.

Sweat trickles down my forehead and neck, and it doesn't help that I might be expressing it. To what I observe to be a stone-faced and confident persecutor, a nice clean suit and tidy hair with a determined posture. I am worse for wear. Half sober, wrinkled shirt with a whiskey stain, on the collar. If I remember correctly, I smelled of a rotting corpse in a hot meat locker. I don't recall what that confident man smelt like, nor would I. That'd just be...off. I was snapped back into reality. "Mr. Luck, do you admit to the first-degree murder of Mr. Tahssa and further charges presented against you?" The judge's voice was clear and direct as if she already knew the answer. "No, I do not believe the charges presented towards me are correct." I could hear the whispers of the jury as if they were shouting in my ear. "Madam if I may?" The confident man began speaking. "This deplorable man is nothing short of a despicable killer, the cold-blooded murder of Mr. Tahssa by Mr. Luck is already on the books as police investigators have linked all possible details to..." He's promptly interrupted by a member of the jury crying out "GUILTY!" and promptly continues before being also promptly removed from the courtroom.
"Madam, it seems the jury agrees with my stance on the matter." He fixed his tie and hair and sat down, his eyes giving me a cold, empty, stare. "Mr. Luck, have anything to say?" the judge's voice beckoned me from my seat. Before I could get a word out, "I don't believe he does, as all further proceedings will be towards me, his lawyer.". 
It wasn't the first time I heard that voice, not at all.

Repent While You Realize Your Wrongs

Nobody is perfect and not everyone is good, I can't give you a solid amount. Though I am apart of it. I had no friends other than Budweiser and Jack Daniels by my side, you kids, well, not my kids anymore. Loathe me along with their mother, and rightfully so. I left y'all when I realized that I wasn't ready to be a father. You know a certain favorite movie of mine got it correct, "Everyone can be a father, not everyone can be a dad" I can't recall the name but whatever. Point is, I'm a father, and a deplorable dad as well. My no longer wife, your mother and you didn't take too kindly to a drunken father with no goals in life. So, your mother and I divorced and she took you. I only ever get to you see once or twice a month. I repent it, it haunts me. I cannot remember when I last had a good night's sleep. Though I can give you a solid amount of days where I've gone without it, or no sleep at all. Jerry's Place is my home now, no Jerry isn't the name of a long-lost friend that I burden with my presence. On the contrary, I burden a bartender named Luther. In hindsight at least, he got paid overtime. Everybody there knew me on a  first-name basis. If not more than likely also by my nickname. D.A.D I never knew what that acronym meant, even now, as I write this from prison.

As before, I don't believe what I did was wrong, though I repent for not finding a way around murder. That I repent for being a deplorable man, a deplorable father, a deplorable dad. I'm nothing short of deplorable. I know it may seem, Pumpkin, that your old man is beating himself up over this. You'd be right on the money, you always have been. I wish I could've seen you grow up and mature, I wish I could've been there for your brother, He's in the wrestling team, right? I repent for not being there for your mother, I hope she treats you alright. She probably won't let you read this letter. And your brother hates my guts so he'd probably stop you too.

-Stay Strong Pumpkin, Daddy Loves You

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