have you and lose you (kendall jenner x reader)

and not lose their minds too

how can anybody have you?

I could tell you the exact number of months it's been since me and Kendall stopped talking. Hell, i could even tell you the exact number of days.
3 months. 3 long fucking months of suffocating in her left behind smell.
It was like loosing a limb. I'm nothing without her, i'm half a human.

how could anybody have you and lose you?

The calls got less and less until they were nothing. as if it never happened. as if those 2 months of pure infatuation never occurred. Our interactions got progressively bitterer until it fucking hurt to speak to you.
And why? i still couldn't tell you. Perhaps that's why the mention of your name twists my stomach until i feel my organs in my throat. What happened to us? Why did you leave me like this?

how can anybody have you and lose you?

Was it me? Was i too needy? Were my attempts at making you smile too desperate? I never even got too tell you i love you. I love you so much that it's decapitating. I miss you you know?  I still walk past your old workplace sometimes, and sometimes i have the urge to run in and kiss you and never stop. ever. but then it hits me, you're not there. you're never there and, you'll never be there.

and not lose their minds, too?

This is killing me. slowly. How can you tell someone everything then leave them with all that. I now carry around all this knowledge about you. Your parents names, your favorite color, favorite song and even then name of your first pet. Why didn't you tell me? You could've stopped by with a friendly smile and told me you were leaving town. But instead i found out by knocking on your door to find an unfamiliar face answer and tell me you moved 3 days ago. And on top of that you've blocked my number and all my accounts on social media. Kendall, why? Why did you fucking leave me? You've left me and it's driving me fucking insane.