Gang Gang

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      Do you remember the day you realized life wasn't anything near fair? Can you remember ever feeling helpless ... hopeless, unworthy and the worse of all Unpretty. Being a chunky girl I see smaller girls and I wish I was them. No I don't hate myself. But my body yes I hate it. When I'm told it's not that bad I feel like I'm being lied to. No I'm not crazy, it's just being put down because your not skinny can really damage your self esteem.
          My name Janae, I guess you can say I'm your typical girl but I'm more than what people see. Before the age of 18 I seen and went through more than anyone could imagine. Certain things are just not to be talked about. I live a pretty fucked up life. I can't complain cause with all the stuff I've encountered it's someone going through worse.
        I grew up in a middle class suburb of Chicago. Not the hood but not the uppity side either. Now I got a big ass family like fr it's a lot of us. The house I live in is my grandparents house so it's our family house. All my people either live here or lived here at some point. Now the way I'm explaining this you'd think I got the perfect family.. Hell Nawh not even. Don't get me wrong I love each and every one of them to death but this family is a hot ass mess. We got those who pick and choose who to be nice to, who to support, who worthy and who not and who go make it or not be shit. And as a family we sad as hell but as I said it's some not all. My favorite Cousin Nani is like my little sister. I swear I love that girl more than life itself. We've been inseparable our whole lives. My other little cousin Amiya she the upcoming athlete of us she goes to a private school up north because she was too good to go to schools the rest of us went to. Now me Nani and Miya are like the Powerpuff Girls. Nani's buttercup, Miyas bubbles and I'm blossom. Yes those are their actual nicknames. No one calls me blossom but lol that's me. Now my cousins Muhammad and Lamont them niggas some demons. We call them Mumu and Monty. Now these my main cousins. Don't get me wrong I got other cousins but these the ones I really grew up with and click with. We then been through everything together ain't nobody as solid as them. That's gang Nem.

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