The story of nearly everything

Chapter 4

I sat down at the table with my eyes downcast. I'm sure if I looked up I would see that shark toothed smile and ice blue eyes. She was the ice queen of the school and I was scared she would freeze me if I took a wrong step. I heard the scraping of a chair and held my breath.
" Are you planning on eating anything or can I have yours?" A familiar voice asked. I breathed for the first time in a minute. I looked up and my eyes were met by a pair of soft, forest green ones. I grinned at the table. Giddy with relief. I looked up and saw the ice queen glaring at me with her cold eyes. I simply smiled. Because in this moment I was happy. I was so happy I could jump to my feet and dance on the table. I had him. I had my handsome, kind star crossed lover and nothing could take him away from me today. Or tomorrow. But it couldn't last forever.
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A fact about me is that I am terrified of heights. Of falling. Of that giddy moment of weightlessness. The rushing of air around you. And before him, I thought falling in love was the same. Rushing. A flicker of light amidst an eternity of darkness. Falling just to hit the ground and peel yourself off the pavement. Only to climb back up to the top of the world and fall again. Then his green eyes came into my life. Those smiling eyes that are so bright you have to squint to look right at them. And then I realised that falling in love is different. Falling in love is less like falling, more like flying. Falling in love is giddy and beautiful. Uneasy at first, then suddenly everything feels right.
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After prom there was one last thing everyone was looking forward to. Graduation. Nearly everyone in the school was going to the same University as there weren't many places you could go in our small town. That meant me and green eyes would stick together for uni and simply the thought of that made me smile. Because I never wanted to say goodbye. I said goodbye everyday and the fact that I would see him again drove me forwards. Nothing else mattered. That thought plagued my mind and pounded my head. 12 more hours. 9 more hours. I'd fall asleep counting. Counting seconds and sheep and hours and breathes until the numbers choked in my throat and dissolved into sleep. I wanted to be with him every second. He was the only thing I woke up for. The only thing that could bring a smile to my lips. There was no boredom with him. I could study his face for hours on end and still find another thing to love. Another thing to live for.
But the question is, what happens when the thing you live for no longer lives. Then smiling gets a little harder. And so does sleeping. And so does living.
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Eep I haven't updated in forever so sorry. I'm dedicated this to @punkwearsconverse because she voted for all my chapters and chose to read my crappy story and I'm thankful for that. I'll try post a longer chapter next time but it might not happen in a while 😁 sorry