Dear Journal,
My name is Sofey Remilia Mokimio, and I am nothing special. I never have been special, and I probably never will be. I grew up in a tiny village, in a tiny home, with my tiny family. I never went to school, or even really had a friend. Dating, naturally, was never really an option. Life was just plain.
You may be asking yourself my dear journal, "Why would someone with a life so boring want to own a journal?" and my answer is, I don't. I don't want to own a journal, I don't really see the point of writing down all of my thoughts and feelings. But my wench of a mother, Remilia Lois Mokimio, decided that getting me a journal to express myself would kick me into a more "creative" life. Unlike my mother, I had the creativity of a limbless seal. My mother was a musical theater star, from Broadway to Teatro la Fenice, Remilia was known for miles. So when she had a daughter she, of course, had to name her after one of her best roles, Archduchess Sophie from Elisabeth.
I never understood my mother. A very flamboyant person, always singing and going through lovers left and right. I, on the other hand, was quieter and reserved. I never spoke out of turn and lived a very boring life. She never speaks of my father as if he never existed. I never asked her either, I guess you could say it was our unspoken rule. Father never existed, and even the thought of him existing was pretty much outlawed in this home. I am my mother's only child, just as she was her mother's only child, and she was her mother's only child. The list of only children goes back for generations, only changing once or twice through the adoption of children or the accidental birth of twins. I was never my mother's child though, her love and caring nature were never shown towards me rather the theater and her countless lovers who consumed the nectar from her bosom. To my mother, I am the black sheep who wandered into her pasture and began to graze. This resentment towards me led to her treating me like I was a lesser being. To her, I was nothing but a disgrace on the Mokimio name. Doomed to be a broken shard in her heart.
Mother always said a lady doesn't become a woman until her first love appears and disintegrates in front of her. From that point, the once young lady will feel the hardest emotions she will feel in her life and fall to pieces. Her heart will be shattered and she will wish that her life had led to some other life. These pieces like a once broken vase slowly come back together and become something more beautiful than it was before. Kintsugi, my mother calls it, I call it useless destruction. The world is full of useless destruction, we all view our world as something we can mold and shape when in reality our "creations" and "improvements" destroy what already was so beautiful and lovely.
I will never change the world, let alone do anything more than be a thorn in my mother's side. I will always have been and will be a plain person without life to live. I will fade away into the abyss that is our world. I, Sofey Remilia Mokikio will die a lonely soul.
- S.R.M
10/26/1992 E.N.D.
