Miss Blue

Chapter Twenty Three 💧

"Miss Blue it's been a while since we've seen you with a guy. Can you explain to us the rumors about you being gay? "Trevor the host asks me.

"Wow I didn't know you guys think that about me. "I say laughing "Trev I'm not gay. There's someone out there who you guys don't know about and the love of my life. "I frankly say.

"When will you introduce us to "the love of your life "" He says air quoting the word love of your life.

"I don't know but I know it may not be soon. It also depends on their opinion "I say.

"But I want to be the first one to know bestie. "He says pouting which makes me smile at his small gesture.

"And what about you James, yesterday there was a picture of you with Catrina Madel one of the top models in the industry. Is something going on between the two of you? "Did I forget  to mention that the management if our company organized an interview for both James and I. We reconciled with Mandie three days ago after so much begging and pleading for forgiveness from me. I was discharged two weeks ago from hospital after my passing out.

"No I'm not dating her. I'm very single at the moment " he states .

"Di you have your eyes at someone? "he ask making me look at James.

"Mhhhhh yeah I have someone in mind but I know she doesn't want anything to do with me. "He says looking sad. Who is the lucky girl? I ask myself.

The interview goes on for a while until it's time to leave. I'm greeted by a beaming Mandie as she hugs me and tells me how good I was.

"I have a test at two o'clock, can you drop me there? "I ask her after I've seen James drive off and I've already changed.

"Yeah I will and take care please. Don't be stressed my dear "

The test went fairly well. Me being the nerd I am finished twenty minutes early. As I walk to my locker, I spot a group of girls standing around it. My eyes nearly pop out of their sockets on what I see. My locker is filled with stickers and paper messages attached to it.Ugly. Fat. Orphan. Bad mother. Bastad.Sick .Slut. whore. bitch. And so on is what I see. Tears already fill my eyes. Most don't hurt me much. What hurts me most is, bad mother and Slut.

Thats when it comes crashing down on me of how a bad mother is, always not having time for her, not being with her, not introducing her to her father. Keeping her a secret.

"Angel, Angel!"That's what I hear but I keep on ignoring the voice. I don't know what happens next but I think I zoned out on people. And passed out

"Mummy, mummy!  Wake up! "

"She's awake" someone shouts.

"What happened? "I ask once I notice I'm in my bed.

"You passed out."Karen says.

"Why?"

"You don't remember? The lockers does it ring a bell? "

That's when I remember everything ,I don't know but tears start falling down and that's when I notice Janella crying as she tries to comfort me.

"Don't cry honey, momma is okay. She's stopped crying, see "I say to her smiling at her.

"I'm truly a bad mother." I say to KK after Janella has left with Darlene.

"Stop saying that, why do you think so? "

"Karen you don't understand, I leave her almost the whole day, I  spend less time with her, I'm more of a screw up more than a mother to her. I  have denied her the privilege of her knowing her father, she will hate me ones she knows who her father is. And that's when she'll notice what a Slut her mom is. "I say crying.

"Shut the fuck up! "A new voice says from the doorway .You are not a bad mom Blue, you are the best mom she has and you are doing everything to secure her and also protect her. "

"Mom,  what are you doing here? "

"Is that all you grasped here even after I went all shrimp to you! "She says

"Come on mum, thanks "I say laughing.

"There's my daughter I know, come here   "She says as she waits for me in her arms which I jump in for a while and allow myself to feel comfortable in them.

"Do you know why I named you Angel? It's because you are the angel of this family. You always lighten up the house even if we are stressed, you always bring happiness to the family. For the past weeks the house has been tense without your crazy self. We miss you Angel. "She says "Don't you dare put into this thick head of yours of what the bullied in school say or write, just keep your head up and keep playing your part. Remember you are doing this for your safe and also Janella's  sake. "She says.

I'm all amazed at how my mum makes me happy and feel good. She walks away after a while and that's when I decided to shower and head down for dinner in my blue penguin pajamas .

"Mummy, mummy "Janella shouts as she heads towards me as she sees me ascending the stairs.

What I hear next is when I stiffen and plaster a fake smile on my face .James fucking Mathews says "Blue! "