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"Don't explore that much. You will be disappointed afterward." My mother used to say when I was a little kid trying to find the hidden places in the world.
I also didn't know that this sentence made sense at some point as a young woman.
Not only did I face a lot of private difficulties, but I also tried to find myself with someone else.
The world had so much to offer.
Why shouldn't I try to explore it? Why shouldn't I try to develop my life with someone else?
Time passed and after two massive heartbreaks, I suddenly stopped exploring.
I have found myself through this process, my true self.
My head is more focused on myself and the people around me instead of looking for a partner.
I have made peace with my past, myself and my condition.
Still, I'm imagining him; That we hear Italian love songs dance while we have fun, take a lot of Polaroid pictures of ourselves, walk along the beach because nothing prevents us from being just two souls who love each other.
I dream of our relationship.
How would we behave? Does he want to be more private or more open?
Where would we go? What places would we love or hate to visit?
Where would we go on our first date? Where would we meet?
When will I meet you? I cant wait to see you.
When will I know that you should be mine?
Where are you?
When can I explore your secrets, your passion, your interests?
This time, I won't be disappointed when I explore it, a soul that I haven't met yet.
