Caim. {Danplan Shorts}

he gave me back

drapetomania
(n.)
an overwhelming urge to run away.

part 2 - as he takes everything from you, and then some.
(implied stosuh, josuh)

    Hosuh had been in the mansion for a whole month. He had only been to a few rooms, including his own, the dining room, and a few more unimportant ones. He spent most of his time in the backyard garden. It was bittersweet, being so close from escaping. He felt like he was losing his mind. Everywhere he turned, absolute strangers watched him. It made him want to cry and breakdown, and he often did so on his bed, in his room.
    Unfortunately for him, at times he'd cry too loud. He tried to keep the sobs down in his throat but one day, where he felt particularly bad, thinking about his old life too much, one of his whimpers escaped his lips and he supposed it was loud enough for Stephen to draw near. The boy had knocked on the door, and almost immediately, he shut up, shielding himself with his blanket. Stephen opened the door to find Hosuh in a clump on his bed. Now, Stephen wasn't one for empathy or sympathy. Neither him nor Jay had any of those two things, besides for each other, and even then, they only showed it through the tiniest gestures such as the smallest cracks of a smile or straightening their shoulders the tiniest bit so they other would know that they needn't be scared.
    This all went out the window for Stephen as soon as he saw Hosuh's red puffy eyes and his shallow breaths, desperately gasping for air as hiccups crawled up his throat. Stephen shut the door behind him. He wasn't sure what to do. He never had to really comfort someone, not in 5 years, no. Ever since he had joined the corporation, the rest of his humanity (which was probably very little, if we're being honest) had drained out of his life and left him a hollow shell, Jay being the thinnest piece of thread to hold him together. And now he found this boy, precious and scared.
    Stephen wasn't sure how he should feel. He slowly approached Hosuh, and the smaller boy flinched. Stephen tried to put himself in his shoes, desperately reaching for any hint of sympathy he still had in him. He wanted to care for the boy, needed to. But his heart was too closed off from the world. Too icy to meet the tiniest flicker of heat, which was Hosuh. He felt pathetic, which was ironic, considering he had kidnapped this weeping boy in front of him.
    Stephen stepped closer and eventually he sat on the edge of Hosuh's bed. They made eye contact. Hosuh's stare was full of fright and something else Stephen had lost touch of. What was it? It took him a moment to process the emotion Hosuh held in his gaze. Ah, that's right. It was compassion, wasn't it? Why did Hosuh feel bad for him..? No, Stephen refused to be looked down upon. Stephen was a mafia king, he reigned superior, and he did not accept Hosuh Lee, someone who hadn't done anything in his life, a meager worm to look down upon Stephen.
    But Stephen's stomach churned and twisted and he felt bad. As simple as that, huh?
    One single gaze.
    Stephen was unsure what to do. He wanted to take care of Hosuh, but his mind wouldn't let him. He wanted Hosuh to care for him, but refused to be loved. He wanted to be superior, but also wanted the gentle touch of someone who truly cared for him. Stephen bit his lip. Slowly, he spread his arms open. He supposed he was going to let Hosuh give him a hug..?
    He hadn't had one in a few years, had he?
    He could see Hosuh's eyes water as tears collected in the corners of his eyes and he pushed himself against Stephen, hitting his chest, sobbing that he hated him, he hated him, he hated him. All Stephen could do was take the soft beatings against his chest, wrap his arms around Hosuh's waist, and listen to the boy as he broken down in his arms.

    Hosuh had fallen asleep there.
    Stephen had awakened first and found Hosuh to still be in his arms. He looked peaceful. That was new.
    "Stephen."
    The aforementioned boy turned around to face who but the infamous Jay, standing in the doorway, his arms crossed. He shut the door behind him and approached the two.
    Jay picked at Hosuh's hair as he looked at Stephen. "What happened?" his voice was flat as it always was and made Stephen reminisce about how, once, Jay's voice had been gentle and expressional, pointed with an edge. Now it was cold and hard. "Nothing." Stephen groggily answered, refusing to look into Jay's eyes, "Talk quieter. You'll wake him up." Jay sat on the ledge of the bed, "Fine."
"Why are you here?"
"You say that as if I did something wrong, love, and I'm sure I haven't."
Stephen narrowed his eyes and flipped Jay off.
Jay grinned and winked at him.
Stephen hated that. He looked away.
"Anyway," Jay continued, "Why wouldn't I be? The real question is why are you here, but I can deduct from my own thoughts of why." Stephen scoffed. Jay was a know-it-all, wasn't he?
Stephen had always been the one unhinged. He was the one who could murder countless of people and feel happy. What a sickening delight it was, for him. He was the one that needed to be confined and imprisoned, to have hazard tape all over his body. Jay, on the other hand, was the one who could feel the very existence of someone drain out of his hands and he would feel absolutely nothing. He was broken, not insane.
This made Stephen think about the life in his hands. Warm, breathing, alive. Jay and Stephen were breathing, sure, and they were alive, but they were the farthest people from warmth. Their hearts, their stares, their very beings were cold landscapes, colder than the deepest waters of the ocean. And they learned to live with it, because, why should they care that they couldn't feel? They didn't feel jealous or sad. Stephen guessed that that was the perfect way to describe it.
"Mm.." Hosuh's eyes finally flickered open, his gaze focusing first on Stephen's face, and then Jay's. He sat upright, away from Stephen, the flush in his face draining out. Jay smiled, holding back laughter as he leaned over to caress Hosuh's face with his hands, mumbling about how there was no need to be afraid. Hosuh was too scared to move, and Stephen could recognize this, but of course, how would he handle it?
Hosuh's breaths were sharp. "I-I don't feel comfortable right now." he wheezed out. Jay's eyebrows furrowed together and he pulled away. "I'm sorry. How can I make you comfortable, reasonably?"
Hosuh's heart pounded. His mind couldn't comprehend the sentence Jay had spoke out. Why-why would he care? Hosuh didn't mean anything to them. Of course he didn't. It was terrifying. Seeing Jay's eyes, flickering between his, genuinely seeming concerned..?
Stephen could see through this. Jay was a sociopath. He was manipulative. And sociopaths often pretended to have feelings for their own benefit. However, Stephen had a sneaking feeling that Jay was truly asking him. Jay was being vulnerable.
Stephen hadn't seen that in a few years.
Then, how did Hosuh do it?
"Uhm." Hosuh looked down, sniffling, and in the softest voice either boys had every heard, managed to whimper out, "I'm scared." "..." Jay grabbed onto Hosuh's hands. The target's were smaller than his, and settled into his palms nicely. "I know you're scared, but that's okay. I'm here. I'll protect you, okay? Everything will be fine." Jay kissed Hosuh's cheek this time.
Stephen looked away.
It was funny, he thought. He had once wandered what the difference between a sociopath and psychopath were. Apparently, psychopaths were more charming where as sociopath's were more prone to outbursts and were more nervous. Stephen thought that they might as well switch places.
That wasn't to say Jay was more charming—of course, Stephen was.
"Hey." Jay looked at Stephen, "Let's go eat breakfast." Hosuh was looking back at him, gripping onto Jay's hand very tightly.
Stephen clicked his tongue and followed them.

ahaha, i didn't freAking know how to end this, so ill probably make a part 3.
Sorry for not updating, i've felt particularly tired these past couple of days (not only that, I've felt unmotivated and I'm a little sick—but those sound like excuses, don't they?), and had spent the vast majority of it just drawing. if you want to see them, my instagram is @vam_iii. check it out, if you want.
much love, v.