D for Depression [Mature]

Chapter 13: Bob

''Is there anything else you want to talk about?''

I look at the familiar pear of blue eyes, before I shake my head negatively.

''No? Are you sure?''

She insists and I feel like crying all over again, but I keep myself together.

''Why do I get the sense that you are lying to me Daphne?''

Her words make my heart sink. I mean I already knew, she would see it anyway. It's not like I can hide from her.

''I understand if there is something you want to keep for yourself. But as your psychologist I need you to know that you can speak about anything with me. I won't judge. I thought we have already made a progress on that matter.''

''We did. I mean...I trust you. You are the only one I can open up. It's just...''

''This is not the time.'' She continues my sentence and I nod in agreement.

''Ok. I won't pressure you. But I really hope you make up your mind and talk to me the next time. I can see something is bothering you and I can't help you If you don't let me.''

''Ok.'' I whisper, gathering my things.

''Until our next session.'' She shakes my hand, giving me a warm smile.

''Goodbye.''

*

I walk outside taking a deep breath of air. My head is dizzy and I feel the need for caffeine.

Dragging my feet to the bus stop, I think about her words.

This is the first time in months I couldn't talk to her about my thoughts.

Making this relationship work based on trust, was pretty difficult. Especially for someone with trust issues like me.

I used to have major panic attacks when I first came to her. I wasn't able to get inside the subway or go to college.

I would cry on a daily base and lost about 7 kg.

My life was living hell. A hell I felt I won't walk away.

But I did. With her help.

We came a long way and I feel guilty letting some random guy, destroy everything I worked for.

Fuck Daphne. You really fell in his trap. He probably wanted to make sure you'll keep your mouth shut and won't talk about the drug dealing.

The bus stops in front of me and I shake my head getting inside.

I find a sit beside the window, plugging my earphones.

The sound of Billie Eilish's voice fills my head, but I quickly change the song.

No more sadness.

Putting the ''Chicken Noodle Soup'' by J- Hope and Becky G, I smile thinking about the person who reminds me.

As if he heard my thoughts, the song pauses, while my phone vibrates.

I look at the caller's id smiling again. ''Stranger''

''Yes?''

''Hi stranger.'' A happy voice greets me from the other line.

''Hello.'' I respond already in a better mood.

''How are you doing today?''

''Good.''

''You don't sound good. What's up?''