I don't make time anymore. A lot of time has passed since i made some in order to think about stuff. I am afraid of myself and what I can think of. I didn't want to write about it again. I felt like I was going to begin writing without a stop sign. I haven't writen in some time and I thought that since I have felt so much I won't be able to write all of those feelings down. My days are full from some time on. This helps. It hells me with not thinking about you and about us, if i can call this that way anymore. I really miss the chapter of my life with you. I don't believe that this is something that will pass along with the years. I have trully started thinking that this pain is something that I have to accept and continue my life with that being a part of me. The way our love was something that I onced lived for, the same way the emptiness, the pain, and the memory of you will be a part of myself, no matter how many years I will get through. I don't know if I feel sad. But for sure I don't feel happy. I don't know if this is emptiness..Not being able to feel sadness anymore, but nothing can make you happy..almost for the past two years. Well..I think I know...I am not happy because I am not with you right now, but I am not sad becase i unconsciously believe deep inside of me that you are the one and we are going to end up together. I just want to feel again.
