Oh god, I want you now

Chapter 24: If you love them, let them go. I guess.

Kinda saddd the last chapter flopped. I swear, when I think I do good, that shit flops but when I think I do bad, you guys eat that shit up. Kinda upset but it's alright I guess anyways,,

Billies Pov:

Time skip likeeeee a week? Yeah sure. So this is Monday, the beginning of the second week since they've broken up.

"I don't want to, but I think we have to,"

It was dark and I was cold. I didn't know where I was at. I was so alone yet still in the presence of another.
My face was hot, my ears were ringing, these words were piercing my ears, "Stop! I can't take it!" I screamed.

"I love you, I do, I really do and you know It,"

With my body rocking back and forth and my hands covering my ears, I let out a belting scream, "Please! God, make it stop!"

"I need time, Billie,"

The louder I screeched, the louder the soft voice Overthrew me. My body was so hot, I was so angry.

I tried to speak, "be civil, act nice," I tried to tell myself but every time i opened my mouth to speak, words were the only things that didn't come out. Instead, I screamed. I couldn't stop.

"It'll do us both good," the voice continued as if it didn't hear me screaming at all.

I pressed my hands harder against my ears. I couldn't block out the voice.

"I'm sorry.. goodbye my love,"

"NO! Don't leave me, you can't leave me!," I screeched.
I heard windows shatter.

I opened my eyes to see that I was in the passengers seat of sevens car.
I turned and saw blood.

Blood was pouring from sevens ears. He was slumped over the wheel, in the drivers seat, his body lifeless, numb.

"NO! Please! What did I do?! No, please! Don't leave me! Don't leave me! I screamed and screamed as I cried next to Brandon's dead body,"

-

I woke up to the same reoccurring dream that I always do. In the same way that I always do. Crying. Sometimes screaming. (Omg🤦🏽‍♀️ What is this, twilight?)

The screaming was only in the beginning.  The first week or so— after the breakup that is. I don't know why. It's not like I haven't seen the dream all before. It just feels so real I guess.

At first I'd say I took it pretty hard as you could imagine. Woke up crying, went to sleep crying. It was the same old, same old for a while.

But then I started to get better. Ha. No. Not better. I think I just cried so much that my body eventually got annoyed and stopped producing tears. Or feelings.

I think I've lost all feelings now. Feelings of everything. I'm not happy, but I'm not sad— but I was mad at one point.

Mad at myself. Blaming myself for everything. And I did only have myself to blame but I knew that. That's why I was mad.

I told myself that I could've fought for our relationship harder. I could've. But I didn't.