How To Irritate A Pirate

Stupid People Say Stupid Things - 3 Part Harmony to Utter Irritation

Right now you have no idea how irritated I am. If you think I was irritated before, you haven't seen anything yet.  I swear on my sarcastic self that this is all 100% true. If you don't like my title, get over it. I'm annoyed.

These two conversations happened within minutes of each other with two of my....hmmm......let's call them.....eejits.

As you know, I play music and usually in music there is sometimes a solo part where a musician plays by themselves without accompaniment and has to keep to their own time. Playing music isn't as easy as going, 1, 2 ,3, 4. Now playing a solo can be a daunting experience because if you mess up, EVERYONE CAN HEAR IT.

It doesn't matter if you mess up anywhere else in the piece, if you mess up the solo, it will be remembered for eons to come. Trust me, I've been remembered by so many randomers because of it, all because of a hamster!

Don't ask.

But I'm getting off track here. Basically whoever makes the solo sound least like a car crash gets to play it. This girl in my orchestra who I have a mutual friendship with, (I.e I know her because she plays the same instrument as me) let's call her Sandwich. Just for the sake of it. Basically she has been complaining to me for weeks on end (more like years) why isn't she moved up to 1st saxophone. 1st saxophones, like me usually play the solo's (not like me) and the 2nd saxophones (like Sandwich) usually play the harmonies. Both are very important parts, if one isn't played then it can either sound weird or monotonous. Not good.

So just because the number 1 is associated with the parts for utter convenience she wants to play first saxophone. Why is this? The solos. These solos cause people who don't play them to become jealous and the people that do play them become terrified. And are ALWAYS in the 1st part. Yes, I admit she is a good saxophone player, better than me even. But you might think I'm being mean here but my problem isn't with this part. Yes, I did get annoyed at her for disrespecting my friend (let's call her Ham) who only joined this year, but the ONLY reason she sits there is to talk to me! Yes, she's able to play the part AND the solo's but we are all Grade 8 standard! So the Frick what!

This is how the conversation went in my mind.

Sandwich: Omg I should get the front seat cuz eh u know I'm soo much better at playing than that newb is!! Duhh! Why is that newb even sitting there? I should get to be first saxophone and play de solo's!

My reply: Look Sandwich, the only reason Ham is sitting there is to talk to me! And about this first saxophone/front seat crap, I'll be leaving this year so you can work it out when I am gone, OK? It's only til the end of the year and I'm gone! Anyways, you know the only reason I got the front seat was because I'm the oldest, that's it.

And then I receive the most annoying reply, ever.

Sandwich: So why don't you two move then?

*mental mind explosion*

*mass war breaks out, Sandwich ends up as a bloody pulp as I stand victorious over her*

Not really. I just got angry and walked off.

Yes this may seem like a stupid rand to you, but this isn't the whole story. It's in three parts. The first was that one, the second links with the first and the third just makes me even more mad! OK. On with Part 2.

Now after me trying to sort out an argument between myself and Sandwich she and her friends start messing around and Sandwich then begins to yell out that her friends are bullying her, basically making me mad and being an ass. Then, she comes out with this diabolical statement.

"People choose to be bullied."

WHAT. THE. HELL.

Just, COME ON! That's just ridiculous!! Just, gaahhh! HOW DARE SHE?! HOW BLOODY DARE SHE!

She has no idea, no bloody idea! People don't choose to be bullied! It's not a bloody Pic' N' Mix! You can't just say 'Oh I don't think I want to be bullied today,' and turn the situation off like it's a switch!

You can't choose something like that, it just happens because people can be cruel, heartless or even jealous.

The only thing anyone can choose to do it, either choose not to bully someone, or choose to move past it and do their best to move on.

It happens to the worst of us, and can either hurt us for the rest of our lives or eventually help make us stronger, but you never forget it.

As for Sandwich?

Obviously you can imagine what happened next.

*total annihilation*