progression | ONE PUNCH MAN

uncertainty

"Hey, Genos, do you think you have figurines made after you?" Saitama asks curiously one afternoon. The two of them were by the low-standing table in front of the television, one sitting in the formal seiza position while another is sprawled across the floor on his side.

Genos, who has his hands folded neatly in his lap, glances over at the bald man. "They are already available for purchase in both online and traditional shopping methods, sensei."

Saitama whisks his head to the cyborg so quickly Genos's shoulders twitch in alarm. "What?" He whines. "Popular, aren't you? What's next, full-sized body pillows?"

"They can be found among my merchandise as well, sensei," Genos replies with a straight face.

Saitama groans. "They love you, Genos."

Genos's eyes remain unblinking. "That is not relevant to me, sensei," he says. "They do not know me, and I do not know them. Their feelings toward me are redundant and should not be taken into consideration."

Not relevant. Saitama wonders if his own feelings are superficial as well. The thought makes his stomach clench uncomfortably. They live together so surely the time they spent together must mean something. He hates this feeling of uncertainty and doubt. Most things didn't aggravate him, but this level of insecurity is starting to make him nervous around his own disciple.

There are so many things he wants to ask the cyborg. But the domestic life they share is more important than his feelings. So he just snorts. "Keep talking like that and your fans are going to develop a praise kink."

The cyborg pauses. Saitama finally rips his eyes away from the television to get a glimpse of his student's reaction. His face is as stoic as ever, but his yellow irises are whirling in what he guesses in confusion. It's confirmed when after a moment, he says, "I do not understand the meaning behind your words, sensei."

Saitama lets out a huff of amusement and turns back to the screen. "I recommend you don't search your database or whatever it's called."

A loud puff of steam erupts from Genos's direction and Saitama startles. There is no visible emotion on his student's face, but the cyborg seems to radiate embarrassment. Genos is avoiding his gaze by all means as he says stiffly, "I was not aware you knew such definitions, sensei."

That makes Saitama laugh. "So that's how you blush!" He exclaims and another wave of heat fills the mild apartment air.

Genos doesn't reply, so Saitama grins and drops the conversation topic to allow the cyborg relief just once. Later, as he is brushing his teeth, the same uncertainty he felt earlier in front of the television crawls up his spine. It's a disgusting feeling, and no matter how many times he tries to think about something else, his own mind is a traitor and spins back to the subject.

If letting out steam is how Genos blushes, then perhaps the cyborg really didn't harbor any romantic relationships to him. The realization is crushing, and Saitama wishes he tried harder to evade coming to terms with the concept. The vise that holds his lungs only seems to constrict farther with the awareness.

Saitama doesn't know when this strange feeling toward his cyborg apprentice started. In the beginning stages of their relationship, the only thing he felt was the need to get rid of this piece of machinery. Eventually, that annoyance turned to familiarity. Well, it isn't as if it matters anyway. Saitama is stuck with these emotions, whether he wants them or not.

He may not want them, but they were a kind reminder that he still is human. His emotions have not faded. They were just numbed, at least, until Genos came into his life.

He ought to thank the cyborg, really. He may not be able to feel the thrill of battle, but his heart can race again. He never expected this. If someone told him he would be longing for a cyborg after his head went bald, he would have laughed and thought the person was mentally ill. Not anymore though. Every day, it becomes more and more clear that the feelings he harbors are not just a mere crush. It is more than just the type that develops on the school playground, or when you see a person with a particularly attractive face.

Saitama thinks it's more than just that. So much more than that.