My name is Tess Devalgo and I'm a singer but my life is completely complicated before I became this amazing person I am today, as far as I know it was because of my anger but whenever I replay my lifestory, it doesn't always seem like I'm the only reason behind this miracle that's changed my life.
Well, I had a big step-sister called Nicole and she could also be a reason why I'm here but she is also the reason that I don't see my family anymore and have chosen to be my independent self. So, it all began when I was young and loved, the only child to both my parents, my life was going quite smoothly eventhough, there were days when I would come home, sit on the sofa and choose inbetween watching TV or cooking with mum. This almost became like an ordinary routine until my parents began to realise it too, so they adopted my step-sister Nicole.
I was ever so happy with this but then my feelings began to slip. Nicole soon began to take advanage of us all and began to come home late, drunk and unstable, the next day my mum kicked off. It was the next morning with the usual saturday breakfast - crumpets and chocolate spread - Nicole came downstairs and then the whole dining room went bizarre.
"What on the earth did you think you were doing last night, coming home at 1:00 in the morning in a state like that? For goodness heaven's sake were you out of your mind, you will soon make us lose the reputation we've got around here if you carry on. I just don't believe this ridiculous behaviour, it happened last week as well but I can't let it go anymore, every week, bloomin hell, there's a limit to everything Nicole, you've still got a week till your 18th birthday, that's what makes me feel so disgusted." Mum went on for longer then this but it was hard to grab all the words inbetween her sentences. "Take a breath mum, you have no idea how I was treated before I was adopted by you, I was abused and wasn't allowed to go out or communicate with my friends and you're right, there are limits for everything and they limited me bigtime, in another week it will be time for you to forget about these stupid limits, I will be 18!" This went on and on until mum became softer on Nicole understandig her past and I did too. However this is where the big problem for me really began.
I really loved Nicole, she was very funny and beautiful but, I felt a bit left out as Nicole was becoming a favourite of everyones' and one day Nicole came and slapped me on the back as a joke, now it was my time to show how I felt! "Nicole stop it, you hurt me all the time and it just is not a joke anymore, and then I end up getting in trouble, you don't understand, they know you properly now and everything you do seems to be okay, I hate it when you blame things on me when I'm not the one that starts on you first, I'm starting to feel second best and I don't mean to take my anger out on you Nicole, I really do love you, but if I take it out on anyone else they wind me up even more." Now I was in tears but I tried to keep it in because I didn't want to look like a crybaby even though, I did get her back for what she did by kicking her on the side of the leg.
"Shut up Tess, you need anger management,you've got severe anger problems, that's just the end of it, calm you're anger, you always think that you are right, do you think you're all big because you can talk to me like that, go find a hospital to get yourself sorted!" I walked out of the room, in an uncontrolable state, my head felt twisted, I couldn't think, pure anger ran through my body, leaving me in tears because there was no one or nothing to take it out on, I tried to calm down like I always do when they make me really angry that I can't deal with it in any other way.
However, I had decided that when the right time comes, that I should go and find that anger management place wherever it is and get myself fixed.
Now I'm 25 years old and I joined counselling to express my feelings to someone I can trust, and I haven't seen my family, for 4 years, I'm even starting to forget what their faces look like, and it rips my heart to think of them but I know it's all for the best and now I'm waiting to relese my new album "Gold," it's a whole new beginning...
