Close as Strangers - A Michael Clifford Fanfiction

Chapter 1

I make my way through the crowded mall with sunglasses over my eyes and a hood over my head. In hopes that no one would notice me, someone had.

"Oh my God! Aren't you Michael Clifford's ex-girlfriend? Scarlett right?" A young girl squeals. Her eyes lit up with joy and the blue-dyed ends of her blond hair seemed to fly all over the place as she jumped up and down.

"C-could I get a picture with you? I mean, you're not Michael but you've obviously spent a lot of time with him," she grins.

I attempted to force a smile but she knew how uncomfortable she had made me feel.

"Sorry.." she quietly mutters and walks away in disappointment.

The horrible truth struck me like lightning. Michael and I are no longer together. It's all my fault that we're separated now. I don't want to make another person upset because of me.

"Excuse me," I tap the girl on the shoulder. She turns around and her eyes are wide in shock.

"Sorry if I seemed to be rude earlier, I just felt-"

"Uncomfortable, I know," she finishes my sentence. "But who wouldn't be?"

"We could still take the picture," I pause, "if you still want to that is."

"No I'm fine, really. I know how upset you must be right now. The band is coming to town and the fear of hearing his name must be a burden for you. I get that feeling when I hear my ex's name around school," she sighs.

"You're a sweet girl. Don't worry, the right guy will come to you soon. You just have to wait," I say meaningfully.

"Thanks, same to you too," the girl pats my shoulder and walks away once again. Within seconds she's lost in a crowd of the rushed people walking around.

Everyone is excited for the holidays. I would be too if it weren't for the fact that I'm by myself this Christmas. The mall was beautifully decorated for the season. Fairy lights hung along the walls of stores and the normal window displays were replaced by more festive ones. The usual Santa and elves were present in most. Others had fake snow made of cotton and that damn snowman from the well-known Disney movie stood proud with a grin on his face.

The sight of all of this is heartwarming yet mine remains frozen.

-

I wandered around my apartment. The utter feeling of loneliness is present and hasn't left for what seems to be an eternity. The memory of that night slowly began to take over my thoughts.

Michael had come home drunk for the third night that week. I couldn't stand him stumbling through the door with an empty beer bottle in hand and the familiar strong scent of alcohol infused with marijuana that would make my nose burn clothed him. I couldn't take the pain of watching Michael ruin his life any further. I packed my things that night after he fell asleep and left him in the morning.

I could've stayed back and helped him but I just had to get away. I regret my mistake of not being there for him and I'm sure he regrets his mistake as well. Luke, Calum, and Ashton were aware but they didn't have the courage to help him.

That's all in the past now.

I watched a couple of their recent interviews. Michael seems happy. No one knows of his horrible past except for me and the boys. Not even his family knows. I can't help but feel like he's better off without me. Ever since I left he's sobered up and as far as I see it, it wasn't the drugs or the alcohol that weighed him down.

It was me.