In 7th grade I was sexually harassed by a fellow student. His name was Tom. Tom would continually ask me inappropriate questions and place his hand on my inner thigh or play with my feet with his. I know some of you are thinking, oh it's 7th grade that doesn't count especially if it's by someone of the same age, but it does. It started after the school year began in the midst of October. I was sitting in Spanish class taking notes when he began to play "footsies" with me. At first I thought, oh he must like me, and in 7th grade that's when you start to develop more emotions and think about dating someone. I took it as a compliment and thought this boy wants to date me. I was wrong, he wanted me as more of an object than anything else.
In November, it was becoming a persistent occasion that he would do this. In math class, Spanish class, and eventually literature. He started to ask me questions that I wouldn't understand, "have you gotten your period yet", or, "do the carpets match the drapes". I was getting annoyed and started to tell him to knock it off or just to plainly stop. Did he listen? No he didn't.
By December, I was tired of it. It became an everyday thing, but it became more aggressive. He would ask questions like, "Can you suck my cock", "Have you ever been fingered", and "Can you touch me or can I touch you". I was disgusted, but what happened next put me over the edge. He was asking many inappropriate questions and I was asking him to stop. He continued and it got to the point where forcefully held my hand down and put his hand on the top of my thigh. He slid it down and was touching my inner thigh and was disgustingly close to my underwear. I rapidly got up out of my seat and ran to my teacher asking to use the restroom. I ran down the halls with tears streaming down my face. I got to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall and cried. About 10 minutes go by and I had not yet returned to class, my teacher had sent a fellow student to check on me. She arrived at the bathroom and asked if I was ok. I said yes and quickly wiped the tears from my eyes, the excuse I gave was that I had painful cramps. I had returned to class and Tom exclaimed the words "don't be a slut". I had gone home that day thinking why me?
In the few days to follow, the harassment was constant and he regularly tried to touch me. I would repeatedly push his hand away. The days became weeks and eventually into months. I was done. The continuous amount of harassment I endured each day became so sickening I would throw up in the girl's bathroom at least once a day. I was in my room finishing my homework contemplating if I should tell my mom or not and if she would believe me. I eventually worked up the courage and told her. I was crying hysterically and told her every single thing he did to me. She comforted me and told me to go to my homeroom teacher before school and explain what had been happening. When I told my teacher I could see the appalling look in her eye grow. Later that day she had told my principal and a meeting was scheduled the following morning to take action. At the meeting, my mom had me write down every vile thing he had said to me. I showed the list to the principal and she was repelled. She said she would contact his parents and action would be taken. In class, my seat was moved and I was sitting at the opposite end of the classroom. I still did not feel safe nor comfortable in presence. His parents were contacted and he was given and an in school suspension. He wrote me a letter "apologizing", it read "Dear... I am sorry for the things I have done. I know those things were creepy and I'm sorry. Sincerely, Tom". That was it.
For the rest of middle school, I feared him, because I knew of the horrible things he was capable of. I ignored him as much as possible, but for some reason he was always there. Till this day he continues to be a sexual predator and targets girls. He sends around victims' nudes, harassing girls continuously, slut shames them, and had supposedly raped his ex girlfriend.
I hope to be a voice to victims of any type of sexual harassment, assault, or abuse. As women, men have been taught from an early age that women have to be submissive and men must dominate them. As a women, I am disgusted that this is still happening. Every six seconds a women is raped, that is because of male dominance. Still today, victims of these traumatic events are shut down are forced to take the blame because of so many stupid reasons. Some of the reasons include, "the clothes they wear" or that "they were being to flirty". These are NOT excuses.
Women and men, take a stand in anyway you can. Protest, share your story, help others cope. My heart goes out to both women and men who have faced the horrific reality of sexual assault, harassment, or abuse in any form. Together let's bring change.
