Let Go

Chapter 18

It's dark for a really long time, and I can't hear anything anymore. I don't know where I am, or if anybody is with me. Everywhere around me is black. It's like my eyes are closed, but I can't open them either. I reach my hands out in front of me, but feel nothing.

I try to stand up, and I succeed. I take a step, testing the waters to try to feel what's around me. I'm confused and I feel dizzy.

I take a few steps without tripping over anything, so I speed up, eventually getting to a running pace.

I start to question if I'm even moving, or if I'm even me, because I can't see my arms when I think I put them out in front of me.

I flail my arms around while I run, but I never hit anything. I start to breathe a little heavier, not because of the running, but because I'm getting a weird sense of claustrophobia. I try to say something, or yell, or scream, but no sound escapes my mouth.

Everything is dark and quiet, and I don't know what to do.

I wish Lana was here to help me, maybe she knows how to get out of here, seeing as she isn't here now.

I stop walking, and try to think. I try to sort out my memories. I try to wrap my head around where I am, trapped in this black nothingness.

I remember everything, or at least I think I do, because I can't remember things I never knew, right?

I know that my parents left me and Jett by ourselves, I know Lana committed suicide, I know Luke Obenham, I know what he told me, and I know what I did after that that brought me here.

I try to look at my wrists to see if the cuts are still there, but I can't see them.

So is this some type of afterlife? Is this all there is when we die?

Or maybe this is where you go at first to figure everything out before you enter some other place?

I feel my eyes well up with tears in this darkness. I can't touch them, but I know they're there. It's weird because there's no physical proof that I'm crying, I just know that I am.

I start to get frustrated as this keeps going on. How do I stop it? Where do I go? Is this all that's here?

These questions run through my mind and I feel like I'm going insane.

And maybe I have.

I scream next. I scream, and I cry, and I yell, and I whisper, and I shout, but I can't hear anything, and I can't feel anything.

The silence is deafening. It's like a thick cloth wrapped around me. It gets hard to breathe, but if I'm dead do I even need to do that anymore? Who's to say that I am breathing? I can't see myself so it's not like I could tell if I have a body or not.

Maybe I'm lost. Maybe I'm supposed to be looking for something that will lead me somewhere else.

I must have gone insane, because if I was really dead wouldn't I have gone somewhere by now? And if I was really dead wouldn't have something happened right now?

Everyone has different beliefs of the afterlife shouldn't one of them be true?

So I sit in this deafening silence, where it's hard to breathe, and I can't find a way out, and I think.

Luke's P.O.V.

I walk through the forest, leaving Abby behind.

Why doesn't she believe me?

Because you fucked up in your past, and you can't fix what's already been done.

I finally get to my car, and drive down the road, not caring about the speed limit.