The Nanny

•2•

2 years later

"LOAI get down from there this instant." I shouted as I rushed to get my keys and purse, dropping them floor as soon as I heard a thud and a wail from the living room.

There my little boy lay on the floor rubbing his head crying as if I hadn't told him to get down from the sofa so he wouldn't hurt himself in the first place.

Loai was my son. . I found out a month after his death that I was two months pregnant. Was it hard? Yes but I got through it. He gave me something to love and to work for. Everything I do is because of him. So I really needed to get to this interview because of him.

I tutted as I loomed over him crying on the floor as he began to sniffle holding his hands out for me to carry him. "Uh uh no... I told you to get down before you hurt yourself and now look what happened. Are your ears for decoration?" I said pulling my ears as I attempted to tell him off only receiving giggles in return.

He was still too young to understand only recently having learnt to walk. "Mabo jo" (Come here) i said as he sat up and I carried him into my arms brushing his curly mane away from his face.

"We need to sort your hair out first don't we" I said as I sat down on the floor with him in between my legs whilst taking a headband off my wrist to tie his Afro with. I made two cornrows and then tied his hair backwards into a man bun. He had the most beautiful curls thanks to his Nigerian and Egyptian heritage.

A lot of people ask me why I don't cut his hair but as a black woman myself I know how long it takes to grow your hair to such lengths and so I wouldn't cut his hair off until he was old enough to ask me to. For some your Afro can be your pride and joy or a curse that you just want to shave off.

I buckled Loai into his car seat setting the directions on my GPS to Baraz industries.

I had a job interview for a job that could change a lot for me. One that would stop me begging the land lord to let me stay in my one bedroom flat when I couldn't pay rent and listening to his crude response

"You know if your having money issues we could settle the debt with a simple night together" he would slur batting his crusty eyelids.

Most importantly it would stop me working night shifts in the local diner with Loai sleeping on a makeshift bed in the staff room.

It was to be a nanny to the Baraz children. The CEO's children. Mr Baraz was a well known man. According to the media -I know I had to do research before my interview - he was 6 foot 4 whilst I stood at 5"7 and had two children. A set of twins consisting of a boy and girl. Not much was to be said about their mother except that she wasn't in their lives.

The job offered me free accommodation in a nearby flat which I would sneak Loai into. At least he would have a safe and steady place to live in. It also offered a much larger wage in contrast to what I was currently earning and it meant I wouldn't be away from my son at night as he slept in a room full of dust and stinking like grease.

This would be the best for him Loai needed this and I needed to give this to him.

I got to the diner with loai and his bag tucked under each arm. Mrs. Beacon the owner of the diner and the only person I had left to call family came running to see my son who she considered her grandson.

She let him stay in the staff room which she had labelled his playroom with a mattress to sleep on and plenty of toys.

"Bee bee" Loai shouted as he held his hands out opening and closing his fists as a way of saying carry me. Loai was a very shy boy not liking attention. He also didn't take well to men trying to carry him he would give them evil glares and scream as if he was crying although there were no tears and then when I would take him back he would smile at them. My cheeky monkey.

"Good luck on your interview hun" Mrs Beacon shouted after me as I turned to leave after telling her why I needed to leave Loai today. "Thank you" I shouted back. I'm probably gonna need it.