The Drug We've Tried

Prologue

Our blue van pulled up to Emily's small blue house. She gave me one last glance before getting out of my twin, Peyton's door of the car. "Thanks for the ride," Emily's uniquely amazing voice said. Emily's eyes shimmered in the light of the sun. Hazel. Light hazel. So beautiful, the tips of my chapped lips formed a smile. I felt my eyes sparkle. Peyton slid the door close and I watched as Emily walked to her small house, her short hair, shaved on half of her small, circular head. The half that wasn't shaved was bleached and recently cut to her chin. We pulled out of the small driveway and all was silent. My mind wouldn't push away the thought of Emily's pale, soft skin and brown hair bleached with highlights. The light of the sun beamed in my ocean blue eyes so I turned towards my phone. The only way to explain how I felt was light. Light like a cloud with no rain. Just the white puff of a cloud high in the sky. My favorite color. Sky blue. Nothing compared to it.
My mom's horse voice interrupted the silence. "I can't do this every time! You have to take the bus. We have to stop this!" She said, dramatically. I just rolled my eyes and kept staring at the screen of my phone. A notification popped up with the meager percentage of my iPhone 8. I brought my eyes to the car window beside me, watching the Oregon trees pass and boredly resting my head in my hands. I felt my dirty blond hair flopping on my head every time we passed a bump. I saw my long eyelashes reach farther and farther down as I drained out the noises of my mother complaining about how long we are staying after school and how we can't hang out anymore. My eyelids felt heavy. I rested my head on the grey seat that was behind my mom and her useless words. I sound mean, calling them useless. But I know none of the words coming from her bright lipstick is going to effect my future.
Soon, I found myself in my car inside the garage. The car was off. No one was in the car. The thoughts ran through my head. What if they locked the car? What if they forgot about me? What am I going to do? I picked up my phone quickly. No service. I knew I was probably being dramatic and overthinking. But anxiety doesn't just go away when I tell it to. I snapped out of the thoughts and forced my hand to the door. Slid it open. A breath of relief piled through my lungs. I jumped out into the dim light of the garage and slid the door shut. I walked up to the door and opened it. It creaked open. Just like always. I walked up the wooden stairs and saw my mom. But without saying a word, I turned down the thin hallway and opened the door to my bedroom. The light switch was turned on as I expected and I went to plug my phone into the outlet across the room in the corner. After plugging it in the white outlet against the dark blue wall, I opened the blinds to the window to let in natural light. My phone buzzed and I glanced over at it. "Happy Valentines Day!" My dad had texted me. I responded with the heart effect and just as I sent it, I got a text from Emily. "I have something to ask you." I went to the blue messages and replied "Alright, you can tell me anything." I try to be as supportive as possible to all my friends. Partly because I know all the friendships and relationships I've ever had have always failed. Everyone seems leaves me at some point. And I want to prevent that. So I try.
"I don't want to make things awkward." I stared at the text from her, not responding, just thinking.
"Do you want to go on a date? I understand if you say no." A smile appeared on my face. In amazement I responded as quick as possible, "yeah! I'd love to!!" And that's how we started dating.
Me, Skyler Elliot. And her, Emily Ann-Marie.

But don't think that's the end of the story. The day we started dating I told my friend, Elijah. Looking up from the car window, the rain, blocking the sun that was out in the afternoon, but not anymore, tapped against the dirty window. Harder and louder the longer I saw the text bubbles on Elijah's side. And that is how it started. I felt my heart beat faster and the stress rise from my spine as she told me how untrustworthy Emily is. How she's done the same thing to Elijah herself, my friend Anna and Emily's ex, Ayla. Who do I trust? How do I trust? What do I do? We just started dating and I was already stressing out. Breaking up would be awkward and I wouldn't want to turn her cute little smile with perfect, white teeth and pale lips into a broken frown. I ignored Elijah, throwing my phone to the ground and distracting myself in my thoughts as I listened to the car radio and focused my mind on the private lessons I was going to. It was Monday. So I had private lessons. I play viola. That's where I met Emily. In elementary school, I went to an after school orchestra. Emily went to. I would always sit with her on the bus and we would go on and on about our day and our family. That was 3rd grade. And it went until I got to 6th grade. Middle school. While Emily was still in 5th grade. But 6th grade was 3 years ago. Now we are in the same school. And talk as best friends. Though we don't have the same lunch time. And next year high school will split us apart. Again. But not any of Elijah's exaggerated reasons, or how many times Emily moves, or switches schools, nothing will split us up.
We love each other... right?