JOURNEY || JinKook ☑️

SEVENTEEN - REQUESTS

Jungkook

Ken, I'm sorry. Did I disappoint you again? How many times did I fuck up? Have you also lost the count? Because I have.

I don't know why I became like this. I'm not blaming you. It's me. I refused to seek help and to accept the help of the people who care for me.

Yesterday, I found out that I acted like an asshole again. I treated Soobin's teacher rudely the other day. I said something about him being a father. Yesterday, when I visited you, I saw him crying near your vault and guess what? He's crying over his son. His son is already dead.

I know. I'm nothing but rude. I should have not judged him. I should have not said anything about him being a father. I told him he doesn't know my story. But even if he doesn't, he said all the truths. He was right. Soobin is the one who is greatly affected by my insensitive attitude. Now I understand why he knows how to handle a kid because he had one. And now I understand why he knew that I fucked up.

Do you still love me? Do you want me to move on? They have been telling me to date but I'm scared. I don't want to lose the love I have for you. I don't want to lose the memories we shared. I'm scared that if I fall in love again, I will lose all the love I saved for you. I know you're not here anymore but why am I still afraid to lose you even more. Weird right?

I hope I can figure things out. But in the meantime, I want to start being a father to Soobin. Taehyung is right, I am angry at how my mother treated me but I am treating Soobin that way. I'm sorry if I neglected our son. I hope you can forgive me. I hope you still love me because I do. I do love you.

I miss you.

***
"Kook!"

I just realized that I am out-of-focus again. I rub my face with my hands. Trying to wake myself up. "Joon I need to go home early today. Can you accompany Taehyung to attend the meeting I have at 6?"

"There's no problem with that but why?" Namjoon picks up the folder I placed in front of him about the meeting.

"Taehyung for sure can do everything for me but I think I need to have at least a representative from my office since I cannot attend." I loosen the tie from my neck. "Jimin's best friend did not accept the job. I don't want to leave Soobin alone at home for long hours. He doesn't want to stay here in the office anymore."

"I thought Jimin called him already? What happened?"

"Jimin said Jin did not give a concrete answer. Besides, like what I've said, he's really pissed at me. So I doubt that he will accept it." I stand up and ready to go home. It's already half-past five and I need to buy some things in the grocery.

"I can't believe it. Imagine, the guy you hit with your car that you said you don't want to be Soobin's teacher turned out to be Soobin's teacher. And the tutor that Jimin recommended is still the same guy. Don't you think it's fate?" Namjoon smiled at me meaningfully.

"Cut the crap, please. I need to go now. Soobin is waiting for me. And Joon, thank you for always saving me." I grabbed my bag, giving Namjoon a pat on the back.

"Seokjin is a nice guy. He is handsome. Why don't you try knowing him more?" I knew it. Namjoon will insist on it.

"Not interested." I opened the door to leave.

"As of now. Anyway, if you're not really interested, then I will pursue him." He teased again and I chose to ignore him. He will not stop if I will entertain his teasing.

***
A/N:
This is how I imagine Jungkook to be. I'm sorry but I am a bad boy JK enthusiast. This is his clothes as well. Sorry, I don't know how to do the editing. LOL. 😅