I did not sleep for a second, at least, falling asleep or the soft, fuzzy feeling of sleep was not in my memory. The entire night a chatter of plans, worry, and a bit of excitement buzzed around my head. But mostly worry. Worry and anticipation.
I slithered out of bed as the sun brushed across my face, surprising unaffected by the lack of sleep. If anything, I was more alert and awake than ever. If this was what it felt like to be a criminal, (at least an imminent criminal) then I should’ve killed her and escaped long ago. Amongst the pandemonium that was morning in the servants’ quarters, I dressed quickly and slipped out before anyone else. For me to pull this off I would have to go unseen during the daylight hours, and try to be as quiet as possible despite the obstruction on my leg from the fall. It still being early and the sun was not yet fully risen, the halls were near empty of servants, and completely void of nobles. The shadows concealed me partially from sight, but mostly I would have to ride on the luck of not being recognized or if so, acknowledged.
As the sun rose, I abandoned my work, preparing for tonight. Getting dressed I had realized that the pearl-handled knife still lay in the large pocket of my apron. It would be perfect. After gathering supplies for my getaway and hiding them cunningly in a sack pressed between the princess’s dresser and the wall where the hidden door was, I took a back servants passageway to the garden. Hidden from sight behind tall hedges, I took the pearl knife and lifted it to my head. If I were to escape with this burden on my old name, I could no longer be Ophelia. I would have to be a boy to lessen suspicion, besides; I could not be a girl alone in the forests. Forests full of bandits and thieves and dark creatures and… murderers. Like me. I could be fairly convincing as a boy, with shoulders that were already nearly too broad to be a girl’s and limbs thickened with muscle from hard palace work. I began to hack away at the ratty, red mess of hair, sawing at it with satisfaction, like I finally got revenge against endless days of pulling at my scalp to untangle savage knots, only to discover they’d reappeared during the days toil. Finally I smiled down with resentful satisfaction on the massive pile of red hair, which I concealed within a thorny bush. My hair was now short, stopping at choppy lengths just past my ears. Looking up into the clear blue sky, I saw the sun was lowering, the shade of blue fading into darkness. It was time.
I crushed a patch of sunset orange tulips beneath my heavy, large leather boots. I had stolen them from a guard, part of my disguise. I wore brown pants and a dirtied white shirt, with linens wrapped tightly around my chest to flatten it and around my forearms and calves to make me appear less scrawny. I dashed in through the servants’ passageway, hoping to get to the princess’s room before she arrived, sticking to hidden passages only to not be seen.
Hurriedly I finally arrived at the princess’s door, peering in at first to be sure it was unoccupied then running in. I pushed away the dresser, grabbing my pack of supplies, then slipped into the secret room, pushing the dresser almost back to where it was, hoping the princess wouldn’t take notice. I waited for nearly an hour, silently awaiting her, fretting and twiddling my thumbs, before the door creaked open.
Immediately I was alert, pressing my ear against the door, heeding every sound. Soon the guards had left, assured that the room was safe for tonight, with so many visitors, some rivals of the king, staying the night after the ball. I knew, though, they would not be far, patrolling the many halls of the castle, and I must be quick. I listened as the princess was dressed in her bedclothes by Cricket and Melina, who were no doubt aware of my absence, and as Faun finally lay down, alone, and the soft sounds of her breathing finally filled the air. She slept. Now was my chance. I opened the door a crack, relieved that it made no sound, then gently pushed the dresser to the side a bit, making way for the door, I pushed it with my hand bit by bit, making the slightest of sounds, until finally it was out of the way completely. Checking to make sure Faun still slept, I opened the secret door with the quietest of creaks. She still slept.
I now stood over her bed, watching the perfect pink lips murmur dreams and her blonde hair sprawled perfectly across the pillow. Sweat sprung on my forehead, and I gripped the lovely knife in my hand. Soon she wouldn’t breathe another breath, and it would be my fault. I would have killed a person, but as I tried to feel true guilt, all I could do was imagine the satisfaction of plunging the knife through the skin and into her perfect, pink flesh. I would have no regrets.
Hand shaking, I raised it over her chest, preparing for the crackle of the knife through bone. This was real, this was happening. I took one last glance at Faun’s perfect, pretty face, and my arm shot down in vicious anger, plunging the knife through her chest. Somehow, the sight of blood spattering her white sheets still shocked me, though I had prepared for it, and her high-pitched scream tore through my soul. Her eyes had shot open, the soft deer eyes staring up at me as she slowly faded from them. Faun was gone. I knew I had only seconds, I grabbed my pack from the tower room, unable to reclaim the beautiful knife. Fitting, the perfect pretty knife kills the perfect pretty girl, she deserved its beauty.
Suddenly realizing the urgency, I flung open the doors to her balcony and sprinted out them. I could hear the guards’ feet coming down the hall, pounding after the fatal scream. With one glance down at the murky waters of the moat, several stories below, I took a deep breath, and leapt over the marble railing. I plummeted, the crisp air whipping around my face, stinging my eyes. Then abruptly the shock of freezing water poured over me, but the shock of impact worse. It felt like all the air had been crushed from my lungs, and I felt as though I was drowning, descending to fast to swim. But my mind suddenly got over the daze, and I flailed my arms around the dark water, draining all my strength to reach the surface, breath sweet air.
Finally my head broke through the water, my breaths short and gasping, my mind reeling and heart racing, blood pumping quickly through my veins. I kicked my exhausted legs and propelled myself towards the outer shore. The guards will have found her by now, and would be on horseback trying to find me. This would be fat harder than I imagined. At long last I yanked myself out of the water and onto the shore, my skin embracing the air, thankful to be rid of the chilling, near frozen water. But I had no time to rest and enjoy my victory; I wearily pulled my body onto its feet, oversized boots brimming with water.
My eyesight was dark, and so was the world as pinpricks of light penetrated the black sky, joining the eerie new moon. With no horse, and nearly no hope, all I could do was run. But if I was to be caught, I would be killed, but I would die revenged, would die satisfied that I could have at least one small taste of freedom. I would join Faun in the grave, succumb to my rightful death. If I am caught.
