A Love/Hate Relationship

(so this is my first fanfic I've ever like been dedicated to writing. Note: it's a ryden that takes place during their high school years sorry if there's typos I'm tired at the moment and I'm not looking over this so

ENJOY!

~Emily)

His lips pressed against mine. This was the moment I've been waiting for for what felt like years.

Wait a second, let's explain this a bit. Well my name is Ryan Ross, I'm 16 years old , so yeah... In high school. This all started the day I realized I had the hots for one of the more popular kids, Brendon Urie. God he was like an angel. I was more of well, an outcast... Why? Because all my disorders... Borderlines, Shcizotypal, Anxiety, where do I begin?

I couldn't keep friends for long... I've really only kept one friend, he was Spencer Smith, we've been friends since like, what elementary school? Sometimes he could start little annoying arguments over religion or little things but he was the best friend anyone could ask for. I dont know how the fuck he's stuck with being my friend for that long in elementary I literally got in trouble every day!

Well, let's set the scene for the day that changed my life.

Normal October day, at high school. I walked in the school basically dragging myself , barely lifting up my feet when I walked. I was dressed in a MCR shirt, hoodie, red skinny jeans and checkered vans, the normal. I walked to my locker on the second floor, ignoring all the insults being yelled at me like "faggot!", "look at the retard!!", etc. always followed by a crowd laughing. I was used to it by now. My phone buzzed as I was dialing my locker code into the baige lockers combination lock. Who the fuck is texting me oh my fuck. I checked my phone, just my mom reminding me to redo my science test and visit my consular. Ignoring both of the reminders I shoved my back pack into my locker and grabbed my binder for my first hour, Science with Mrs.Howell. I closed my locker and went to look for Spencer. "Ryan!!" I heard a familiar voice call. I turned around to see Spencer, whom hadnt even gotten to his locker to drop his stuff off. "hey spence!" I replied. "c'mon to my locker with me I'm a bit late as you can see" he gestured to his back pack. "yeah yeah I'm coming" I said.

We made our way through the hallways and half way to Spencer's locker I saw Brendon, with his regular group for Wednesday's, the cheerleaders. All except one, Jessica, she's my sort of friend and she knows to stay away from them. Brendon looked over and saw me. "hey look who it is! The emo faggot and his little guardian!" Brendon exclaimed, followed by cute giggles from the seven girls surrounding him. I but my lip and looked down at my feet, trying to avoid seeing what was happening next. Brendon and his squad of girls made their way over to me. Brendon pushed me, I almost lost my balance because I wasn't expecting it but recovered. Spencer gave Brendon a dirty look then said in a almost bitchy tone "listen, do you even fucking understand the pain Ryan goes through every day?! And on top of that YOU! Teasing him constantly!!! Do you even know about all his disorders that make him this way?! He didn't choose to be this way! Go fucking mind your own business and be a bitch somewhere else!"

Brendon looked at me, then Spencer, and in defeat walk away in a snuff, the girls following behind. "thanks for saving my ass back there" I said as Spencer put in his locker combinations "no problem it's what I'm here for ain't it? Just here to save your ass right?" Spencer replied sarcastically. I laughed quietly and hesitated then said quietly "y'know about my crush on Brendon... Right?" "WHAT" Spencer basically yelled, causing everyone in the hallway to go to a hush. I resisted slapping him hard then when everyone began their talking again said "DUDE THAT WAS FUCKING MEAN TO YELL THAT!" I whispered loudly. Spencer noticed a cheer leader, one of Brendon's friends, trying to eavesdrop after that commotion Spencer had made. He nudged me and gestures to her secretly and we changed subjects. "so.. Did you study for your test retake?" he attempted a new subject "eh... Not at all I'm probably just gunna blow it off... Mrs.Howell won't care" I replied "dude you're fucking screwed if you don't retake it, you got a E!!" Spencer noticed the cheer leader had left then went back to our conversation about Brendon. "how could you fucking love the guy who makes your life living hell?!" he exclaimed. I shrugged "he's hot, aaaand the way he makes fun of me is kinda sexy!". Spencer face-palmed and shook his head "you're hopeless" he said. " I know!" I replied cheerfully. "well it's 7:27 don't wanna be late for home room like yesterday, Howell would get soooo mad at us!" spencer said. I nodded in agreement as he shut his locker.