Belongs To An Insouciant

I just know your name

Ilham

I wanted to do my specialization now so I was busy getting all info about my choice I wanted to be an oncologist not an easy choice but I really wanted to be that.i was busy browsing internet when I heard a knock on my door .I saw the time it was almost 10:30pm,who can it be at this hour.Baba sometimes comes to see me because he's busy during most of the day.

"Coming".I said putting my Duppata on .
I opened my door and I was astonished to find Moosa on my door,I was not covering my face I never knew it could be him,Damn.
"Asalamalikum ".He was in his suit .He looked pretty exhausted, as much I really wanted to bash him for coming to my room but I refined myself from doing that.Why was I kidding myself I couldn't do that any way.Cuz I'm not that person.
"Walikumsalam,why are you here" I replied as politely as quickly as i could covering my face with my duppata .
Because no matter how polite nature I may have or even if I didn't want to bash him talking to him was the last thing I wanted .

"Everyone's sleeping I saw lights of your room were on could you get me something to eat cuz I don't know where's everything kept here and I'm really tired" .He said in a requesting tone .He could have looked for everything it wasn't that hard like he had to dig wells.

God I really wanted to not do this right now.
"Ok I'll get you something ".
I couldn't say no.
"Thank you I'm going to change ".I nodded and came to kitchen to warm him some food.Why couldn't he have something in office .

I took out Beef curry and rice to warm them up in the microwave .

"What is in dinner ".He came back he was wearing a loose tea,shirt and a trouser now.
"Pulao(rice dish) and beef curry. "
"I don't want to have rice right can you make me some chappati with curry " .
God he is bargaining for alot now.

"Ok ".I took out dough from the fridge to make chappati's .He was standing beside counter pouring water in a glass. He took the glass and started drinking .

"Why have you covered your face it's just me and you here there's nobody else and as far as I know I'm not just your cousin who you're suppose to cover up from ,I'm your husband and I saw you just now ,or you are trying to make a point about something here" .
His tone was not like he was taunting me,it was like was just mentioning a fact ,just asking a mere question,he seemed almost like he was not one who ever beats around the Bush kind of a person.

I turned to face him.
"I still don't feel it's a good enough reason for me to not cover up from you.Our relationship is just on a piece of paper it may be an official one but its not an emotional one ,I don't know you ".

"So you don't know who I'm really ".He was astonished of me stating a simple fact about our relationship too.And then his look became completely blank next second like he didn't wanted me to know what he felt .A simple revelation took him off guard.

"Yes that's what I'm saying aren't I,Yes I know your name but there are 1000 more people that I know by name but that doesn't mean I know them and I'll like to keep it that way between us ".

I started making him chappati, I said too much in return to his few words I shouldn't have talked to him at all since what relationship I had him with was meaningless to me.

He said,"It's time to know my wife than,since I have no intention of keeping it that way,my wife should know who she belongs to now isn't it."i heard his voice next to my left ear, i don't when he came so close to me,he had both his hands on counter and I was trapped between them,I froze as if my limbs forgot how to move,
"Just so you know I have your pictures." And he left .
What the hell who sent him my pictures,Maryyum Ya Allah this girl.
I served him dinner in the dinning room next to our kitchen .It took me alot of effort calming myself down after what he did.For all the things I wanted to say to put him in his place,I was so disorientated.

Whatever he wants now isn't happening so I'll let him think what he wants to,because this was how much I could tolerate being around him.Specially after what he just did now.

No matter how it was done,how it started I couldn't dishonor nikkah because of what has happened afterwards I never intended to end this ,that thought never crossed my mind in the beinging,so it would have been real if Moosa had ever came back and showed he wanted this if he would have cared.It was very hard coming to terms with the fact this was something very real I was agreeing to,to what whatever extent of real it could have been it still won't be nothing like it was today.But now I know too I can't take it.

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So was it only up to Moosa to come to her,couldn't she have made a move she's his wife after all,or her age played a part in too.
What do you think 🤔?