Hollow Souls (the short story anthology)

Through The Hollow Eyes Of Goner

You came to see, to see the story unfold and draw to an end? Well there is no end until the day the world ceases. Whatever scream or cry that exists today carries on the story. I wish to tell a story. The story of the eyes of Goner. He used to be a sweet child, never cared about the downside of life and loved everyone and everything. What happened is what people ask. Well the story is and isn't simple.

He once cared for all around him. He fell in love. He enjoyed living. Then it was snatched. He fell into a dark hole filled with beasts, demons, and spiteful death wanting to drive to get back what was his, but it was too late. Yet he still pursued it knowing it was out of reach. It felt too close to him, but far enough for him to see that he couldn't reach it.

Was there any sympathy from those who struck him down? No. There was no sympathy at all. They just left him to continue chasing something that was now out of his reach. Soon everything else became irrelevant to him. What exactly he was chasing he didn't fully understand anymore. He would rather burn out trying to grasp what was lost than fade away. Fade away into the dark. Like all light, it fades into darkness; the same with Goner. He burned. He kept burning. At the same time, he was fading into the dark.

He changed over time. If it was a good change or bad, we don't know. I don't know. He slowly and continuously kept committing to insanity. A painful procedure to endure. Painful to look back on too. He kept quiet and tried to keep everyone away from going too deep into his mind, and did so successfully for a small amount of time. He trusted very little in people and that led to him being able to keep it all to himself. Spending too much time alone with only his thoughts, cracks through his mask started to show. That fake smile was starting to falter and people began poking at the mess that was within.

He wanted to escape. Escape the prison he was locked in. Escape his mind and start anew in a place elsewhere. But there was no escaping this reality, stuck in his 'hometown' which didn't feel like home at all. He spoke to one person about his dreams and wishes. He felt a little trust in this person. This person was one he could take his mask off to. He learnt that this was a person who also wore a mask and hid away with the toxicity of their mind. Meeting this person, he decided he would help others over time. Helping them by empathising with them and helping them let their emotions out and grow. But as time went on, he learnt that the people he would make promises to were never really there. He learnt he was still alone with his mind.

All of the past would flood his mind over and over. Knowing he was bearing it all alone. No one truly by his side. He tried to let his mind run free of insanity but could never grasp the freedom. He would only touch slightly with his fingers. The promise he made to his lover. He couldn't forgive or forget it. The feeling of vicious murder would fill his mind. That freedom pushed away by the blood he wanted on his hands. The blood he wanted to see splattered across the walls and floor that caged him in. The memory of his broken plans drove him mad; alone with madness. a bitter sweet place to be with the realisation that everything is pointless.

He still saw her face every day. He watched her move along, he kept her close to have something to live for. Although his only reason was to live was her, he couldn't bear to get too close. He was empty and didn't want to absorb the life from her. He still felt love for her. He knew he could have a future with her in it, but just not with her. That broke him, but kept him alive. He didn't want to hurt her in any way by disappearing. He helped her through different problems, made her laugh, did random acts of kindness. He did this to try fill the endless void within him. He wanted one thing but didn't want to lose what he already had. So he kept quiet, and remained quiet. The love he felt for her was intense, yet hidden. He hid his suffering well enough that she didn't know he suffered. That's the way he liked it. That's the way it still is.

I still continue to try make her happy today, but now it's been so long that I feel like I'm just another person in her life. I still help others to try distract myself from my thoughts. I haven't learnt my lesson. I know I should try to move on, but it feels impossible. I've chained myself down and thrown the key out of reach. It's not something I can be free from myself. I need another soul to unlock those chains.

There are others out their suffering. They will do silently and with no one knowing. It may be someone you love. It could be your best friend. Whoever it is, they need someone to help them out their void.

Suffering in silence is a terrible ordeal; it leads to the creation of hollow souls.