I am at the weirdest stage in my life right now where everything just seems wrong. I know God created everything in this world perfectly as it should be however I just feel off. I've noticed I am becoming a 3rd in more situations than one. It's great all of my friends are starting to find their people but I'm still just here, supporting from the sidelines. Don't get me wrong, I'm genuinely happy for them, it's amazing they are finding people that love and care for them in the ways their soul needs, but I feel as if my soul needs that to. I don't need a significant other, but just someone. God and I frankly have had a rough couple of months together and it's been getting better. I truly believe that my relationship with God comes before everything. When my relationship with him is off everything is, so I think my out of place feeling has to do with that. It's hard for me to open up to people about my true issues because I hate to be a bother (that's my Enneagram type two coming out), which makes it harder for me to build close knit relationships with people. I have my small pack. I'm also a huge people person, I can strike up a conversation with just about anyone, anywhere, anytime with no hesitation, but its not fulfilling what I feel I need. I can't be left alone, it's my greatest weakness. I need human interaction to function and when I'm left alone I go insane. I like to be heard which is good and bad. I worry sometimes that I'm going to become too dependent on having others to hear me out and reassure me with advice I've already told myself. I worry I seek attention too much instead of being humbled by those around me. I don't trust myself a lot of the time. What if I can't listen to my own brain? What if one day I become so dependent on other people I can't think for myself anymore? I have strong opinions and beliefs, but will I ever compromise them for the sake of being heard? When will I finally be able to listen to myself and care for my own needs?
1 Corinthians 6: 19-20 says "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."
I take this as God wanting us to care for ourselves as we are not our own, but as all of God's creation made in his image. Making my body's needs, God's needs for us. God wants our bodies and souls to be fulfilled with peace, grace and be strong and fruitful. Taking care of ourselves is a show of honor to Christ, so why is it so hard for me, a christian who knows with all my heart that I am loved and created in God's image, to care for my body? If I know I am apart of God's creation why don't I treat myself like it?
1 Corinthians 3: 17 says "If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him. For God's temple is holy, and you are that temple."
We apart of God's temple, and he cares greatly of it. Is God upset when we disrespect ourselves? According to this verse, yes he is. God forgives us for viewing our bodies in a disrespectful way, but he wants us to come to him and seek help. God doesn't want us to be ashamed, or embarrassed, he wants us to feel and know his unconditional love in everything we do, even when it comes down to loving and respecting ourselves.
What I've learned tonight: God wants us to love and respect ourselves. We are made in his image and should love our self just as much as we love every single other thing he created! Loving yourself can be a hard thing to come to do, but doing it through Christ by diving into what he has to say about it really helps make a great impact on how you view yourself, and how to see yourself though God's eyes.
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Daily Bible devotional
Non-FictionMy struggles in my daily thoughts, and what God has to say about them.
