Songs of Milan

Love Me Now

I am remembering love
I asked my heart to introduce me to a man, and then i met you, my smile
I am remembering love
Love is blind, and sometimes i prefer it that way, my mouth was moving but that wasn't your focus, you stopped time and infiltrated my mind to guide my thoughts to a life worth knowing, only then did you forget to warn me of the dark times that shadow your presence and shift the weight of your ego onto my heart
I am remembering love
Blindly misplaced my own values and needs into another's faith, but do not be alarmed, this is everything you wanted
I am sick of carrying this disease that was shot into my heart by fragile boys, remove your pain from inside of me and allow me the peace you stole
I am remembering vengeance
You were probably drinking with friends, cursing to the darkness as your patience dissipates in search of this unfound high you cannot lose within shot glasses of your weakest self, in those disconnected somber thoughts of what we were supposed to be numb your conscious, and the next day you tell yourself you're fine, you remember my smile
I am remembering lonely nights
I wished you could enter the darkest hours of my mind and walk us into safety, you'd make it perfect, but i don't blame you, a boy can never fulfill the shoes of a man without structure
I caught the smile in between your lips in the form of lost words, you can't open up for me
I stood down and dealt, all to build a love that I've searched for all of my life, it will never be in you
Love is manipulation of our best and worst selves
I am remembering blue skies
Sometimes i miss the me before you, sometimes i miss the me in the beginning of you, sometimes I'd do anything to change the me that i am now with you
You tell yourself i hurt you
I am remembering guilt
If i held control over who I'd give my heart to i wouldn't have chosen you
No one ever warned you of the power in which my love possessed to move you to sadness and surrender conscious to a slight remorse
I am remembering infidelity
I am remembering being caught in the rapture of vibrant distractions until you could no longer sustain such a muse, when the lights were placed back into my eyes and there you were.. alone holding hands with the darkness that raised you.. you weren't the cure
Did you think about me? Or were you able to escape me and hide away in a secret part of your mind where we are estranged..
I'm always caught between what you wish and what i am
I am remembering my worth
I am not afraid to let you go. Why should i be? You were comfortable enough to mistakenly think you can never lose me, but why should you have been? When i gave you every reassurance possible that your spot was valid despite you showing me every reason why it shouldn't be, i played my role in silence
I am remembering love, the happiest place my heart has ever known
I realized i had to choose, and i chose to sacrifice myself in order to never lose you, to never hate you, in order to protect you, i surrendered my peace and the muse within my heart in order to tame the darkness that corrupt you and forced my heart to kneel
I am remembering love
Never beg a man to love you
I am remembering my value
You will look for me in everyone who comes after
I am reintroducing myself
I've lost my smile, peace of mind compromised and the joy of what i knew has left me, for him, that isn't love, he does not love you
I am embracing my worth
Im the earth, I'm the water you walk on, I'm the sun, I'm the moon and the stars, i am your heartbeat.
I am the one who got away.

I broke my heart to give my soul peace.
Love me now.