More Than This

one

It was a regular day.

Another night wiping glasses and tabletops, stirring and serving drinks to rich men and women who don't know when they've reached their limit, filling the atmosphere with their loud and boisterous laughter as they either dance their nights away at the makeshift stage or boast about their newly bought mansions. The only upside of working in this place was the jazz music being played by the band wearing fairly expensive suits and dresses in black and gold colors. It makes it easier to block out the unwanted noise and just revel in the smooth sound of music.

Working on a cruise ship was never his dream, but then again after the event that happened in his life that changed everything, nothing ever really fell into place with him. He often thought that everything happens for a reason and growing up, he prided himself in knowing that after every bad circumstance in his life, he's confident that there'll always be something at the end of the tunnel that will change everything and make it all better. But after going through the worst possible circumstance, he realized that maybe there's not even a tunnel to go through. There wasn't light at the end of it because he wasn't even in a tunnel. It's just a never-ending darkness where the end of it would be oblivion. Nothingness. Death.

If he didn't have an ounce of humanity he would've taken his own life long before. He would've been selfish for once and did the one thing that's been plaguing his mind ever since and went through the only way he knew was an escape from his horrid life.

Oblivion. Nothingness. Death.

A taunting thought. But he couldn't bring himself to go through with it. There was still one thing holding him back.

A tap on the counter brought him back to reality. He looked up. It was a girl he hasn't seen on the cruise before, not even when he's serving as a waiter at the ship's restaurant. He's good at memorizing faces so it's a surprise that he's eye to eye with someone he can't recall given that the ship has been on board for 4 days now out of the 14 days it'll be cruising around Asia.

He didn't delve into it though. 40 seconds was the maximum time he's given a fuck about another person's existence. Well, except for one person.

"You've been wiping the same glass for the past 3 minutes. Good to know this ship cares about sanitation." The girl teased, a soft smile etched on her pretty face.

A pretty face.

That was a weird thought. He hasn't thought about anyone's appearance at all, let alone think that someone's attractive. Wait. Why was he entertaining the thought of another person for more seconds than necessary?

He shook his head slightly and gave the polite smile that he usually shows every person he encounters. It wasn't much, it was forced, but almost everything he does is.

"Sorry about that. What can I get for you?" He asked, placing the glass on its proper place and finding other things to clean to give the girl a hint that he wasn't up for stupid conversations and to just get it over with.

"Just one of those apple flavored beers you have." He served the drink on a slim glass with a single apple slice on the side making it seem like it was just juice. Might as well be actually. She was eyeing him and he could feel it. It wasn't the first time someone ogled him that way. He lost count of the number of times women ordered a simple drink just to sit on the bar stool and try and flirt with him. It was tiring turning them down, but entertaining them would be worse.

It was different this time though. The girl was just staring at him, drinking from her glass. She wasn't even trying to start a conversation, she was just... well, there.

He didn't want to come off as a snob, even though he was. The girl wasn't trying to make a pass on him and that was good, so he eventually relented and looked back at her. Her stare wasn't invasive, she wasn't checking him out or judging him, she just had this glint of curiosity in her eyes. The soft smile came back to her features and he allowed himself to, for once, look at the person before him instead of giving a mere glance.