Hetalia one-shots <3

2p! Police! FACE

*Warnings: Swearing. (It's 2p, of course xD)*

"I'll get out of here soon, don't worry your pretty little faces~" Taunted a (h/c) behind prison bars. She enjoyed watching as thier faces would change from pissed, to amused, to down right annoyed in a few seconds from each other.

"Have fun with that doll face. These bars are the toughest steel around. No way in hell can you even think about escaping." Said what she assumed to be american, Allen Jones.

"Please poppet, you've tried and you failed. Four times now. Stop trying, because we will always get you." Replied the British one, Oliver Kirkland.

"But it's always amusing to chase down a criminal. She's the most interesting one we've ever had the pleasure of keeping an eye on." Chimed in the Canadian, James Williams.

"..."

"What? Got nothing to add in pretty boy? By the look of it i'd say you want to, but are too chicken shit to do anything." She taunted again, standing from her sitting position and approached the bars squishing her face in between the cold steel with a smug face.

Again, the Frenchman, Francois Bonnefoy, said nothing as he approached the bars and flicked her nose. Hard.

"Ow! What the hell Frenchy! What's got your balls in a knot? Can't get laid or anything?" She replied, pulling her face away from the bars as she rubbed her nose with her fingers.

(y/n) heard him growl as he went in the open the gate and give her a piece of his mind before Oliver had stopped him.

"Francois, don't. It's what she wants. You open that door, and she'll make a break for it." He replied, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him back from the gate. 

"Aw.. You're no fun.. ruining all of my plans for fun.. When was the last time you guys had a fun time eh?" She mimicked a canadian accent, watching as James had twitched at her poor attempt.

"Listen here, you make fun of my accent again and i'll skin you before the judges even see you, got that eh?" James replied, stepping towards the gate and reached in, grabbing her collar and pulled her forwards.

(y/n) laughed before doing a two-finger salute.

"Aye-aye captain."

James growled tightening his grip on her collar before releasing her again.

The four had to admit. She may have been a complete flirt, taunter and a bit of a jerk, she was definitely amusing, and beautiful at that. They were glad that they were assigned to her and no one else. God only knows what would have happened had Lutz gotten her.. At least she kept them entertained.

(Y/n) watched as they turned to leave the room for a moment before calling out,

"Aw, bored of me already? I thought I could have done better to keep you guys amused." She replied, plopping back down on the hard bed, one leg dangling off the edge as she heard them sigh and leave.

-With the 2p's-

"What are we going to do with her eh? She's getting more persistant with escaping."

"No worries my dear Jame. The poppet can't escape. Those bars are steel, and unless she had a flamethrower, she can't get out."

"Oliver, this is (y/n) we are talking about.. the doll face could escape a mental asylum with heavily guarded doors with a straight jacket and blindfold on.." 

"Hate to agree.. but he's right.." 

The four of them had stood there a few more minutes.. thinking of a way to keep her in there without escape. No little later did they hear a crashing sound.

"What the hell?" They said simultaneously minus Oliver.

"Swear jar~"

-Back to inside the room-

Inside the room, they all walked in to find (y/n) gone, but nothing was out of place.

"What the hell?! Where did she go! She was just right fucking here!!" Allen yelled, running into the jail cell, aggravation lacing his voice.

"Wha- How- when- What?!" Oliver stuttered, tripping over his own words at the disappearance of the female. 

"I knew she couldn't be trusted eh! Did I not?!" James flailed, continuing to yell about how he was right.

"Alright, lets just calm down and figure out what happened. We left, heard the bang, came in, and she was gone.. sounds about right.." Oliver said, regaining his composure. 

Allen and James seemed ot have the same idea as they both removed the large bed frame, and sure as hell, there was a large hole leading to freedom.

"Got her now.."

-With Reader-Chan-

"hehehe... suckers.. That hole was huge yet they didn't notice.." She grinned, crawling the last few meters to freedom. 

She wasn't stupid. She had made the tunnel like a maze, purposely putting in dead ends and long ones at that in case she had to make an escape, they couldn't just follow one path. They would get lost like kids in the woods.

Peering out of a man hole, she lifted the heavy lid off the hole, heaving herself up and placing it back in it's normal spot. 

"Time to have some fun~" She cheered silently, before running off to do what she did best.


-2p's-

"What the hell!! How many dead ends are in this god forsakken tunnel?!" Yelled Allen, turning himself around for the fifth time.

"The poppet isn't stupid Allen. Remember that. She must have been digging this thing for forever.. why else would these tunnels be long and so many of them at that.." Oliver replied, following behind.

"When I find her I swear.. I'm going to chain her to where she can't even squirm or breath.." Said an angry Canadian, brushing roaches off his shirt."

"I'll do worse.. I'll kill her." Francois growled.

"Now now guys.. this is what being police is about. Chasing down criminals who escape, and keeping people safe, right? Besides, I don't know about you guys, but i'm having fun~" Oliver cheered lightly

"Hate to say it.. But he's right.. At least she gives us something to look forward to for this shitty job."

A chorus of 'yup' came from the three as Allen had seen the manhole (y/n) used not to long ago. 

"Finally!"

He crawled as fast as he could to get to it, practically throwing the lid off and climbed out, stretching as the others followed suit. 

"Now, let's find her befo-"

Not long after did they hear a bank alarm sounding, and a yelling from the rooftops above.

Expected, there was (y/n) in all her glory, large bag of money slung on her shoulder.

"Farewell my lovely cops, it's been fun, but now, I gotta run!~" She yelled, blowing a kiss for them and begun to jump from rooftop to rooftop.

They sighed in chorus, running after her from the ground, but inside, they all knew she was one of the best criminals they have ever had the pleasure of chasing, and possibly loving.