Broken and Fixed.

Chapter 4.

1st October

Phil's POV

"Did you know that an adult male lion's roar can be heard up to 8km away?" I ask.

"Yes Phil, you've already told me that," Dan says, rolling his eyes.

"Oh ok. Did you know that lions can run at up to 81kmph?"

"Yes Phil!"

"Did you know that lions-"

"Phil," Dan warns, putting emphasis on the 'I'.

"Well what else can we talk about?"

"I don't know."

I think for a bit. What will help Dan recover? He's loved YouTube for a while. I know! He can make YouTube videos. Like me.

"Dan!" I shout making him jump onscreen.

I laugh as he says, "Jesus Christ Phil. You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Well I have an idea. Why don't you start making YouTube videos? You already have a channel, you just need to upload your videos. I'll help!" I ramble on, while Dan just stares at me.

"What?" I ask, concerned.

"I can't Phil. I just ... Can't."

"Why?"

Why can't he? Is he scared? He can't be scared. Can he?

"You wouldn't understand," he says, looking at the floor.

"Dan. I do understand."

"How would you? You haven't been what I've been through. You don't know what it's like. People. They'd see my scars Phil. They'd see them and..."

"Dan," I say calmly. "I know what it's like. Just look."

I hold my arm up to the laptop. Showing Dan. He gasps.

"You see those faint white lines?"

He nods.

"They are my scars. We are more alike than you think, Daniel Howell."

*Flashback*

I run. Faster and faster. Back home. What home? What home is there to go to? My mum just shouts at me all the time. My dad never speaks to me. What's the point in going home?

By the time I decide to not go home, I'm already there. I may as well go in. I open the door, my school blazer hanging off my skinny shoulders. I dump my bag on the floor and head upstairs.

I sit on my bed, thinking. Mainly about life. How it's not all its cracked up to be. Ok. Stop Phil. That's way too deep for a 15 year old. I then notice a pencil sharpener sitting on my desk. I can't. Can I? I grab the sharpener, taking the blade out.

I hold the blade over my arm. My heart beating fast. I lower my arm, the blade just touching my skin. If I press down slightly I will cut. A trickle of blood escapes down my arm and I find it thrilling. Captivating. The liquid drops on the floor. I move up my arm, cutting as I go.

I stop when my mum gets home and I clean my arm. A ritual I do every night after. Every. Single. Night.

*End of flashback*

"See Dan. You are not alone. I'm here."

"Phil. I didn't know. I-"

"Dan it's fine. Only you and my parents know."

"I might try making videos. Just for you though Phil."

"Night Dan."

"Night Phil."

I end the call, laying back on my bed. I turn over, going to my drawer where one last blade is kept. I don't need it anymore. I never will. I never did. I open my window and chuck the blade out onto the campus. Finally happy with myself I shut the window and turn off the light. I fall asleep instantly, dreaming of lions.

Dan's POV.

I didn't know. Why Phil? I just. I can't even. Why?

After the call, I went to buy a camera. I'm going to start making YouTube videos. Just like Phil. My favourite YouTuber who just a few months ago didn't know I existed.

I buy a camera which should be here in 9 days. The 10th. Until then, I'll plan my first video. I fall asleep, different ideas for videos flashing in my mind...

A/N hey guys xx
I'm so sorry I didn't upload this part last night like I said I would but hey. As Dan would say YOLO. Well he probably wouldn't say that in conversation. Anyway. See ya.
Hannah >^.^<