Emotions

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Hurt
There is a deep sense of hurt,

whenever I am reminded 

of you


I can't believe 

that at one point 

I mistook fear

for butterflies,

and being in love

with 

you


even with you gone,

and not dealing with your manipulation

I still feel the hurt you caused

daily




Happiness

Hello

sunshine,

you are warm beach days,

and ocean breezes,

you are warmth on my bare skin,

and a sense of freedom


when I think of happiness,

it is all about being in control,

and free

the world is big and full

there are opportunities in every corner,

but the world is also so small

and I can bump into you

at every edge




Pain

I am known

for pain,

I have only known,

pain


and as your hand no longer constricts my neck,

the rope will have to do

and as you no longer slice open my skin,

the knife will have to take it's place


as you no longer scream bloody murder,

my ears will have to shatter from the music 

blasting through the speakers of my car

as you no longer push your entire body weight onto me

I will suffocate myself, trap myself, feel out of control


because you were the one to show me pain,

and that is all I have known,

I follow all the paths

with the most pain,

and it's a comfort to be in such a familiar place


I may have moved away from you,

but he did the same,

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