The one where the choir gets sold to One Direction

Chapter Seven: The Lair

"MHSVC..."

"MHSVC."

"Milford High School Varsity Choirs, wake up!" We jolted out of bed and found One Direction looming over us expectantly.

"What was that for?" we asked.

"We found the Hand God's diary on the roof and we've been reading it all night! Here, read this part." One Direction urged us.

"'Dear Diary, I think I might be a furry'?!"

"No, not that- though we should probably save that for blackmail- read the other page. It says she has a secret island and it has the exact coordinates."

"This is so convenient!" we cried, "Now we can avenge Joey's ghost who has been haunting us since the last chapter!"

"AVENGE ME!" Joey's ghost wailed.

"God can you shut up?" Julia Gilewski gagged.

"Well, there only one thing to do." we decided. "To the bus!"

We all hopped onto the bus, which took considerable less time with our diminished numbers, and we set off. The coordinates were for an uninhabited island in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, so it took a little while to drive there. On the way, we did the dirty with One Direction, but unfortunately, it got a little too rough and Ryan died from complications.

Once we got to the island, we walked around until we found the entrance to an underground bunker that was made from a natural cave system.

"Hmm... There's a password." One Direction announced.

"Oh, I know what it is." said Jenna. "That idiot uses the same password for everything."

"How did you know what it was, luv?" One Direction asked curiously.

"Oh, Kitchen gave me her Wattpad password a while back when we were writing a fanfic together and I just figured I would try it." she shrugged. "It's actually Horse—"

But she was cut off by the sound of the metal door mechanically opening behind her.

"You can tell us later, luv. Come on."

We followed One Direction into the cave, creeping along until we found a huge opening in the cave. We heard voices coming towards us, so we hid behind some crates. The Hand God spoke first and we recognized the second voice, but we just couldn't place it.

"He's really nice and we snapchat all the time but he's kinda mildly homophobic and I just don't know what to do."

"Dump his ass."

"I know I should, but I want to talk with him about it first."

"Damn bitch, I don't know what to tell you."

"Wow you're so helpful. Just try to figure out where One Direction is hiding the Choirs. I need more memes to distract me."

We could hear the Hand God walking away, and the other person walking towards us. They rounded the corner of the crate.

It was Nate?

"What are y'all doing here?" he yelled.

"What are YOU doing here?" we asked. "Are you on her side now?"

"Yes!" He replied, almost offended. "You had sex with One Direction without me, and you didn't even pick up the call from the hospital when I overdosed on nic!"

"Oh, that's what that call was." Sean realized. "Sorry, we were busy."

"Well now I'm busy." Nate growled. "And you know what they say: You either die a hero or quit choir and become a villain."

"I've literally never heard anyone say that." One Direction said. "And you can't work with her. She's a furry!"

The Hand God suddenly appeared behind Nate. "What the fuck? Are you guys shit-talking me to my new assistant?"

"You literally said you were a furry in your diary." Anna said, disgusted.

"I didn't say I WAS a furry, I said I thought I MIGHT be a furry, those are not the same thing. And I am not a furry, but if I was, there's nothing really wrong with being one as long as I'm not hurting anyone. It's literally just a hobby."

"You're getting awfully defensive about this." Ansley said uncomfortably.

"And the last part is debatable." said most of the Center Stage boys in unison.

"Yeah, let's just drop it." One Direction pleaded.

"Whatever," The Hand God mumbled. "Just, release the wolves, I don't really care anymore."

"Oh my god! She IS a furry!" We yelled. But the Hand God didn't respond, she just flipped us off as she walked away. Nate pressed a button on his phone and wolves began to howl in the distance.

"Oh my god! Puppies!" Ansley then ran towards the sound of the wolves and was never seen again.

"Luv, we should probably start running if we want to make it out of here alive." One Direction shouted at us.

We turned and began to run the way that we came, but Tim was once again slowing us down.

"I can't carry Tim anymore!" yelled Joe.

"That's fine. I can take him." responded Brianna.

"Oh, so when Joe can't carry Tim it's fine, but when I can't, I get yelled at?!" Joey's ghost wailed.

"Joe is like two feet tall. He has an excuse. You don't." Audrey argued.

"Well I'm dead now, so it really doesn't fucking matter." Joey's ghost seethed.

"Uh, gang? I think we made a wrong turn." Alex said, pointing at the underground lake up ahead, completely blocking our path. We stumbled to a stop, almost falling over in the process.

"Be careful MHSVC. The baby!"

"Wait, what?" said the Hand God as she pulled up behind us on a skateboard. "You guys are pregnant? How does that even work? Are you all simultaneously pregnant with the same baby? Damn that's a good meme."

"Uh we're not entirely sure how it works." We admitted. "Hey, what happened to the wolves?"

"I just keep those wolves to scare people. The only way they could kill you is if you went up to them and tried to pet them, but who would be stupid enough to do that?" the Hand God laughed. "I probably could've just played wolf sounds on YouTube and had the same effect."

"Well, if you're done talking, I think we'll be leaving now." One Direction said. They grabbed our hand and dragged us into the water.

"It's a good job you taught us how to swim, innit." They said before diving down and pulling us with them. Luckily for us, there was an underwater exit to the cave, and we just made it to the surface outside, but not before Julia, Julia, and Julia managed to drown.

"Come on, MHSVC. We have to get back to the bus."

"No, we can't go back on that island. We can swim back to Hawaii. Call Weeks and tell her to meet us there."

Then we swam back to Hawaii and collapsed, exhausted on the beach.