LUMI-STOR (PART 1 - A compilation of Poems and Random Thoughts)

POEM NO. 1

TITLE : DEEP REST (DEPRESS)

    A/N: I made this poem when I was so down and I don't know why but I just have this feeling of being too much lonely in life. I made this around the year of 2019.

When I was just a kid     
I don't know what's in my mind
because I don't know anything
and I don't care about everything

Time had passed
and I found myself growing up
I see things I shouldn't see
And I do things I shouldn't do

When I was a kid
I wanted to be an adult
and now that I am
I wanted to go back again

Growing up and seeing the beauty of everything
Made me say "It's fun being in here"
But seeing and experiencing bad things in here
Made me asked myself "why am I still in here?"

The feeling of being with everyone
And doing great things with someone
I should be happy because I am not a no one
But in the end I still felt like I don't have anyone

Despite of having a complete family
that I can called as my home
A friends that I can called as my family
I still felt empty like there's a hole inside of me

I tried to open up
Hoping that someone may lift my soul up
But instead of getting a good advice
I just end up getting a strange look and laugh

No one can understand what I'm feeling inside
I look like an empty room that has a little and fading light
Let's say I'm not physically tired
But mentally yes I am super tired

I wanted so badly to stop breathing
All I wanted is to lay down and close my eyes
Let myself covered by darkness
And let my mind be in a deep rest

Living in a messy world everyday
That is making my life worst everyday
Made me kneel down and pray to Him
Saying "please take me away from here"

I wanted to go in a far away place
Where I can peacefully rest myself
Away from sufferings and noises
because sadly to say I am super depressed and I need space

-L.O.F

P.S:  Please don't kill yourself guys. Just let it out. It's okay to be down but standing up is much better.