The City of Lies

Chapter 1: Adjustment

The Upper East Side always consisted of girls and boys my age walking towards their expensive cars their daddy bought them, with their designer handbags and designer clothes. I made this observation almost everyday on the drive with my mom from school just outside of Manhattan, into the deeper areas of the Burroughs. 90% of it doesn't include cars more expensive than the house I currently live in. I've always envied the kids who grew up in such a beautiful part of the city, where they never had to wonder if mom or dad's next paycheck would pay for all the bills and still be able to feed their kids. In the back of my mind, I wished I had the funds to at least own a car for myself instead of having my mom pick me up and drop me off everywhere I went. Don't get me wrong, the life I have lived for 17 years has humbled me and taught me that working for what I want will inevitably provide me with more satisfaction. I am thankful to have to have grown up in a cozy house with with my hispanic family which consisted of my mom and my older brother John; however, the thought of living in a penthouse and not having to worry about money wasn't awful. 

Ding

I looked down to see that my moms phone had gone off. On it read "Dave," I immediately rolled my eyes laid my head against the window. Dave is the man my mother has been seeing for about a year now. I assume he is good for her after her state of depression but he is nothing like my father was. Dave is an Upper East Sider. He is the dad who gets his children cars such as Maserati's or Bentley's and gives them an allowance of about $10,000 a month. 

Often, on these car rides through the Upper East Side I daydream about my dad and what it felt like to hold him one last time. It has been four years to this day since he passed away of a heart attack. I vividly remember giving him one large hug and kiss on the cheek goodnight. I had no clue that it would be our last hug. For months I regretted not saying "I love you" that night. All I wanted was for him to know that I loved him with all of my heart, so the guilt ate me alive and I refused to leave my bed. No shower or food for a week. My mom would have been worried about me if she hadn't fallen into the same depression as I did, John was left to pick up the pieces and I still look up to him to this day for being able to get me out of bed, into the shower, and cooking a nice warm meal. 

Now here we are four years later. Experiencing the same things, on the same drives, passing the wealthiest part of Manhattan. The only thing that makes today different than any other day is that my life had unknowingly taken a turn when my mom turned the radio off to signal that she had something serious to tell me. 

"Honey, I have something to tell you." 

"Yes?" I said in confusion 

"Dave asked us to move in with him." 

Everything went quiet. The only noises heard inside of the car came from the streets of Manhattan with the honking of taxis, cars, and buses. My head felt just as loud as the city streets. I didn't know what to say. there was nothing for me to say. John and I didn't know Dave very well nor, did we ever try and get close to him for the sake of our dad. 

"No offense mom, but I can't see us all living together. I know you care about him but our lives do not correspond."

"How can you say that? You haven't even met his kids and you know that I have never asked Dave for anything." 

This was in fact true. A year together and my mom still payed for her own things no matter how much Dave tried to buy her things or provide for her. 

I took a deep breath, "His kids have lived off of thousands of dollars of allowances while John and I don't even have a car for ourselves."

She understood what I was saying but insisted we move in with them, "I get what you're saying but I think it will be good for us I wanna feel like a family again."