How To Procrastinate On An Essay Without Really Caring

We're Not Gonna Procrastinate...

"Why does every goddamn song on the radio have to be about getting high or getting drunk or getting in the sack?!" Tori rolled her amber eyes. For the fifth time this hour.

"Because pretty much every teenager is either getting high, getting drunk, or getting in the sack." Tori's tone was sarcastic. Nothing out of the ordinary.

"What about David?" Tori and her best friend, Brynn, turned around to find David Maddox and his friends playing "Magic: The Gathering" on a group of desks on the other side of the classroom. Tori rolled her eyes a sixth time. Eye rolling was a terrible habit for Tori. 

"Pretty much, Brynn." Brynn grinned and shook her head. Soon, Tori was laughing as well.

"Oh come on!" a squeaky voice creaked. The girls' smiles quickly erased and turned towards Caitlyn Neblett.

Caitlyn was notorious for butting into people's conversations and trying to make a notoriously liberal argument/speech about it. The girls don't mind forward thinkers and all, but Caitlyn overdoes it. And that's why she annoys the hell out of everyone.

"I mean, does nobody care that these songs have no deep messages and that these songs are brainwashing this nation's youth? The government is poisoning us with this trash!"

Shut the fuck up, Caitlyn, Tori thought.

Mr. Cantoni rose from his desk chair and folded his hands, glaring at Caitlyn.

"Ms. Neblett, I understand that it is your constitutional right to speak freely, but I am also in charge of everyone in this room. Therefore, it is my constitutional right to say, 'No one cares. Sit down.'"

Caitlyn slowly eased into her chair. Mr. Cantoni was a really chill person, but he (like everyone else) seemed to hold an obvious grudge towards Caitlyn. This meant that he could sometimes be very rude to her. But in his defense, she did not know when to shut up.  

 "Now," Mr. Cantoni continued, "I would like to address to you the purpose of the test I gave you yesterday."

"To stress Logan out until he cried?" one student guessed.

"Shut up, I did not cry!" Logan yelled. "It was the almond blossoms outside."

"It's not almond season," the one student replied. "We don't even have almonds!"

"Anyways," Mr. Cantoni intervened. "The purpose of this test is so I can see your guys' writing styles and habits." He quickly picked up the tests on his desks, and gave them back to each student one by one as he continued. "The questions were easy. They were all based on pop culture references and your own opinions. However, I noticed that a lot of you have put down opinions that I really don't think is your opinion: they are what you think I want your opinion to be. The opinion questions were intended to tell me about you; your personality, your aspirations, your drive, your views on politics and society. And do you wanna know what I got out of your answers? Almost nothing significant. I am beginning to think that this nation's public education is brainwashing you guys into not have an opinion of your own! We are not in the Soviet Union, so this nation's youth should have a strong view on current issues and should be ready to defend those views! It's time that a teacher actually taught you something valuable, and I guess I'm gonna have to be the one to do it." He had just finished passing back the last test when he grabbed a remote, pointed it, and turned on the SMARTboard. 

When everyone say the first page, they groaned. It was an assignment. And it seemed like a huge one. 

"Calm down, it's not that bad," Mr. Cantoni reassured.

How would you know? Tori thought.

"You are simply writing a partner essay on your strongest belief on something. It doesn't have to be about current events. It can be about pop culture or society or how 'Napoleon Dynamite' is the best movie to have ever graced the land. I just want you to form a strong opinion so that I know that you're just not the mindless, uniformed zombies older generations think of you as. Just give me something. You may work with a friend, worth a grand total of 250 points, due during finals week."

Everyone groaned as they searched for a partner. Tori and Brynn already knew they were gonna work together. 

"We're not going to procrastinate this time, right?" Brynn asked as she pushed back her beach blonde hair into a ponytail. "Because this is a 250 point assignment that can drop us two letter grades if we don't do it."

"Of course not! We're not gonna procrastinate."

"Just remind me to actually do it. I always forget things."

"Promise."

They had an entire half hour to get started on the outline, but the only thing they did that was related to the assignment was get a piece of paper out. They spent the rest of their time looking up funny posts on social media. 

When the bell rang, and everyone walked out of the room, Mr. Cantoni shook his head and asked himself how many people are going to turn in a terrible essay.

Outside, Tori and Brynn stood against the lockers over by the library with their other friends. Hanna Golightly was talking about something funny in her math class, when Tori tunes her out and looks outside her group. Who she caught eyes with was probably the most handsome guy to ever grace these crappy halls. Short brownish-black hairk, light blue eyes, olive skin, all in a mixture of pure handsomeness. Tori stared at him, and he stared back. He grinned at her, and she smiled back. Tori thought she was going to faint. And she almost did.

But when she saw Francessca Vanderson inside his arms, she felt sick, and angry. That bitch ruined everything for every girl in this school for as long as they've known her. And Tori had enough. She didn't know who this guy was, but she was determined to steal this guy away from the evil war lord known as Francessca Vanderson.

And that was the last time she and Brynn remembered to do the essay.