The Winter That Could Have Been.

The Explanation

I remember every single second of that day, the memories are constantly replaying in my head, pushing themselves to the front of my brain, making my body shiver with terror. It makes my heart ache, it makes my vision turn red, it makes hot tears roll down my cheeks and it makes me scream out loud. That was the day that my life changed forever and for me, there was no going back. They took my body and shook me, tipped out my heart, my soul, my mind, until all I could feel was emptiness. And anger. And sorrow. They broke me. I was such a vulnerable eighteen year old girl, small and skinny with bright green eyes. Clueless, and stupid- I didn't think. I didn't think until it was too late. After they had scared me and taken everything I had ever owned away from me. If I hadn't done what I did, I wouldn't have lived. I would be dead. 

They destroyed me and shredded my heart in to a million pieces, intercepted my brain with their evilness and tried to turn me in to something I would rather die then to be. I had witnessed things that one shouldn't have to see in a lifetime, all in a matter of days. Yes, they destroyed me but they did not kill me. Although, they were close. But I couldn't let them do what they were doing. I was obliged to escape, to act the hero and save the lives of others, putting myself at risk of death. It was up to me to stop the cruel and unforgivable act of evil that took place; I was the only innocent person who had understood what was happening. I was the only person who could end the horror that was haunting me.

And that brings  me to the story of how I turned from an innocent eighteen year old girl, with bright eyes and a wide, welcoming smile, to a pale faced, broken body with tangled hair and shadowed eyes, which were constantly staring in to the distance. A girl who was drowning in her own thoughts, screaming at her own visions. It is time for me to explain what happened and why my heart aches when I think about the winter that could have been.