“Life is full of unexpected things.Life is challenging.Life will not always be fair and the only thing that we can do is to accept it that way.”
Sana hindi na lang ako ipinanganak.
Bakit pa ako nabuhay kung hirap lang din ang mararanasan ko.
Bakit hindi na lang ako namatay.
Minsan mo na rin ba itong naisip o sinabi sa sarili mo ang mga katagang iyan o di kaya'y natanong mo kung bakit naririto ka sa mundong ibabaw?
Kasi ako oo.
Iniisip ko palagi kung bakit pa ako nabuhay kung puro paghihirap at sakit lang rin ang mararanasan ko.Bakit pa ako nabuhay kung simula't sapol nag aagaw buhay na ako.
I was diagnosed early with leukemia which I inherited from my Mom since I was born.Unfortunately my mom died ng ipinanganak ako kaya ang ipinangalan sa akin ay Lucky.
Masuwerte raw ako dahil nabuhay ako despite sa critical condition ni Mama.
Pero kabaliktaran ng pangalan ko ang naghihintay na bukas sa akin.Maituturing ko nga bang masuwerte ang sarili ko kung unang mulat ko pa lang ay may nag aabang na sa akin na kamatayan.
Ngayon sabihin niyo maswerte pa nga rin ba ako?
Mas lalo pang lumala ito ng ika pito kong kaarawan.Sa murang edad I undergone many medical treatment which helps a lot to prevent me from pain but sadly can't even stop leukemia from spreading throughout my body.
Naalala ko pa nung araw na inggit na inggit ako sa mga batang masaya at malaya na makapaglaro, makihalubilo, makipagsalamuha at makapag aral.Simula ng lumala ito mas lalong naghigpit si Daddy sa akin.Alam kong ginagawa nila ito para sa kapakanan ko.Si Daddy,Si Miss Angela—ang private nurse ko,Manang Dolor at Manong Berting, sila yung mga taong palagi kong kasama which I will be forever grateful for having them in my life and I'm lucky to have them.
Sa labinlimang taon akong nabuhay tanging libro lang ang naging kaibigan ko.I was homeschooled before but it doesn't last because it turns out na alam ko na yung mga tinuturo nila because of reading books.I was the carbon copy of Mom as what thay always said pati ang katalinuhan nito nakuha ko.Nakuha ko lang kay Papa yung kulay tsokolateng mga mata.Pero hindi rin ako masyadong nababagot dahil nag te-take ako ng swimming class,music at dancing pero nasa bahay lang.
Everything changed when I turned 17 years old.I experienced body ache na sumesenyales ng paglala ko.Nabahala si Daddy at pati ako kaya kailangan ko na raw sumalang sa chemotherapy.Araw araw tinitiis ko tuwing sinusumpong ako ng pananakit ng katawan.Halos ni isang araw hindi ako umiiyak.Sa mga nagdaan na araw unti unti akong lumalaban pero naglaho lahat ng namumuong tapang ko ng sinabi ng Doktor na posibleng may taning ang buhay ko kapag hindi ako kaagad sumailalim sa chemo.
I was devastated and hella stressed at that time.I feel defeated and at the same time lost.
Nakakalungkot isipin na tinalikuran ko at sinisi ang Maykapal sa kalagayan ko pero narealized ko na may plano ang Panginoon sa akin.
And I accept my fate whole—heartedly.
Imbes na sumailalim sa walang katapusang treatment,na hindi mo alam kung mag wo-work ba o magigising ka pa, I find myself na lubusin na lang yung natitira kong araw.Ayoko na magpa-alipin sa lintek na sakit na ito.Alam kong tutol sila Daddy pero I've made my mind.
To live my life to the fullest
I choose to live a meaningful life and a meaningful death.Life is precious.Sufferings and pain may come to me physically,emotionally and spiritually I will always choose to be fully human and being alive is the thing I can do even amidst from pain and sorrow.
I want to take a big risks.I don't want to die full of regrets.I don't want to live my life full of depression,fear,anxiety,discomfort, or isolation.
I want freedom.I want to escape from reality.
I want to do the things that the teen age do.I want to travel far away from everything.I want a fresh start and the ony one place that I'd rather spent my left days is —KNIGHT DUNVALE ISLAND.
A well-known paradise island in Asia .It was built by one of the wealthiest family in Asia, Mr. and Mrs. Knightbridge.According to what I've search, It was built since 1990.The Island was composed of Hotels,Bar,Boutique,Mall,Restaurant,Groceries Store,Salon,Mini theater,Park,Library and even Church.It was exclusively only for elite teenager.Every summer there are only 200 slots kaya agad agad akong kumuha.Spending the days with Dunvale was great.I meet friends,enemies and also a gorgeous guy.I didn't expect that I can build a strong relationship with them and create unforgettable memories.And I hope hindi ako mahihirapan na lumayo sa kanila kapag susuko na ang katawan ko because they doesn't deserve me-they doesn't deserve the pain.
And I don't deserve them either.
BINABASA MO ANG
Kiss Me Goodbye
Teen FictionWhat would you do if your life has time limit? Well there's only two option. Accept your fate or Fight until your last breath. Lucky Harte Ramos, a young woman in her 18, was informed by her doctor that she had only 2 months to live. Instead of und...