TRIGGER WARNING: talk of eating disorders and relapse
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richie isn't okay, at all. he needs eddie back, desperately. it's like he can't function without the kaspbrak boy by his side. it's killing him.
except, eddie doesn't want him back. because richie is just so nerve wracking. eddie can't stand him sometimes. god, he loves him to death, but he just can't. not right now. he's getting ready to move for college, away from derry. he's leaving for california in exactly a week and a day. his flight is at 8 am, and he just has to have everything perfect before he leaves. so, he broke up with richie, 2 months ago. he doesn't want long distance with richie, he wouldn't be able to stand it. i mean, so what if he's been crying himself to sleep at night without richie? he's a big boy, he doesn't need richie by his side for everything in life. even if they'd both prefer it that way.
"bev, i just don't need richie nagging me every fucking 5 minutes this next week, i need my space. okay? i'm leaving, and it hurts, i wont lie. but i need this! this is for me, not for him!" eddie said, neatly putting his stuff in his last suitcase.
"he hasn't said one fucking word to any of us. i love you, but that's my best friend. he hasn't came out of his room since you broke up with him, over text, yeah i didn't fucking forget that part. he's not getting better eddie." bev whispered the last part, moving to stand in front of the frantic boy.
he opened his mouth to say something and then closed it. "i didn't- this wasn't supposed to happen this way. he was supposed to be okay with it. i didn't mean to hurt him, i-i would never hurt richie." he whispered, tearing up.
"well, you did. he's broken. you're the one thats holding him back from coming with you eddie. he needs you, you're the only thing holding him together. without you he crumbles, he's doing it again eddie, he wont stop." her voice faultered, and eddie's eyes widened.
"what the fuck! w-why didn't you tell me?! he's doing it again? why would he do it again? he has to stop or - or he'll die.." eddie said, trying to wrap his head around everything. "no, no. he stopped that when we turned 14, he promised me. he wouldn't do that. bev p-please don't tell me he's doing it again." he said, his voice strained as he tried to hold back his tears.
richie used to be bulimic. he was severely depressed. it started when he was 10, going on to 14 before eddie noticed. he would binge eat and then throw it all up.
flashback
"richie! come on asshole! bill wants us to meet at the arcade in 15 minutes!" eddie said as he ran up the stairs, careful not to trip over empty alcohol bottles. it's sad really, how you can literally smell the smoke and alcohol all around the house.
eddie sighed as he reached the top of the stairs, "richie come on! we're gonna be late!" he groaned, shoving richie's bedroom door open. he frowned when he looked around to see that richie wasn't in there. "chee come on, where are ya?" he sighed, looking into the closet and under the bed. "come on rich this isn't funny, we need to go" he groaned, looking in the closets in the hallway. he heard shuffling in the bathroom and rolled his eyes, opening the door.
he was expecting to find richie laughing his ass off as he stood behind the shower curtain, not what he actually saw. "oh god, rich" he whispered, covering his mouth as he took in the sight.
richie was on the bathroom floor in a puddle of throw up, full of blood in it.
eddie quickly rushed over to the boy, collapsing next to him, pulling his head into his chest. "richie p-please. i-i dont know what to do. please be okay, i-i need you" eddie whispered into his shoulder, crying. richie was breathing, he wasn't dead. this happened quite often really. he would throw up extra hard one day, and simply lay there, frozen. half unconscious, half awake. of course eddie didn't know that, he didn't know this was normal for richie.
