Showstopping: A Miss Piggy x Gordon Ramsay Fanfic

Chapter 1: Fresh Off The Runway

POV: Miss Piggy

It's fashion week in Paris. I still can't believe I was chosen to model on the runway. When I was invited, it was the happiest moment of my life besides my wedding. I feel like a goddess in my dress, I've never felt so gorgeous. I hope Kermit thinks so too. The sleeves are puffy with rainbow sequins, it's so long it trails behind me while I walk. Just as I'm putting my earrings in, I hear my name called.

Excited, I jump out of my seat, putting the earrings in while I walk. I know it's dangerous, but I just can't wait. The model before me walks off the stage. It's showtime. "Introducing Miss Piggy!"

I take a few steps. The cameras are flashing and everyone's looking at me with awe. I look through the crowd for Kermit, when a certain person catches my eye. Blond hair, and oh my god his eyes. They're blue like the ocean and I feel like I'm in love. That's when I trip.

POV: Gordon Ramsay

The model on the runway is absolutely gorgeous, I've never felt so strongly about someone before. If only she would notice- suddenly, she's looking my way. I knew being front row would be worth it. I just hope we run into each other afterwards, maybe we could go to a bar and have a drink or two. Suddenly she falls off the stage, screaming. I run to catch her.

As I'm holding her in my arms, we look into each other's eyes. She looks so helpless, I want to protect her for the rest of my life. I'm her protector, no one else.

POV: Miss Piggy

I want to fuck him so badly. Forget the rest of the world, who cares if I fell? Let's do it right now. I lean in to kiss him, but then I remember Kermit. The hottie looks a little shocked, but not in a bad way. He leans in, whispering in my ear, "the name's Gordon, meet me backstage."

He helps me stand up and I go back to reality. I've made a fool of myself, what if Kermit saw me try to kiss him? Did anyone else? I start to tear up, pushing people out of my way while I run towards the curtains.  Once I'm backstage, I'm sulking. My mascara is an absolute mess, I look like a rat. I've ruined everything. 

A few of the other models come over to me and try to comfort me, but the only person I want right now is Gordon. Where the hell is Kermit? You'd think if your goddamn wife fell off a stage and started crying you'd try to look for her. Lousy frog.

As I sit down in one of the nearby chairs, I notice a piece of my dress missing. Ugh, I really hope they planned on letting me keep it or else I'm screwed. I reach to wipe my tears with my hair only to realize how much fucking hairspray they used in it. It's crispy.

POV: Gordon Ramsay

Even with tears streaming down her face, that woman is flawless. A real snack. (badum tss?) I should probably go check on her soon, but my wife will be pissed if she doesn't see me in the crowd. My little piglet probably has a husband who wouldn't be too happy seeing me with her anyway. 

I watch as the next few models walk the runway, but none of them can compare to her beauty. The rest of this will be boring, Tana better be up soon. Finally, she appears from behind the curtain. Stunning, but how will I choose between her and Piggy? I want Piggy so badly, but I have a family. I don't want to ruin it. A forbidden romance, I love it.

POV: Miss Piggy

My dress is soaked with tears, and there's still more coming. I didn't even notice when Kermit walked in and sat beside me. I couldn't pay attention to anything he was saying. All I could think about was how much I fucked up and also how hot Gordon is. Before I know it, Kermit is stroking my hair and holding me. 

I begin to think about how dumb I had been to try and kiss Gordon, Kermit doesn't deserve that. I love him, but I love Gordon too. I don't even know him but I know we were meant to be together. I'm so stupid, how could I go and cheat on Kermit so quickly? Oh right, I'm a horrible person.

"I tried to get in earlier, but the guards wouldn't let me. Sorry babe," said Kermit. I don't deserve him. I thought we'd spend our lives together but now I just don't know. He'd want me to be happy right? Talking to Gordon wouldn't be so bad, would it? Kermit doesn't have to know. "I don't think they want me to be here, so I need to get going. I'll see you back at the hotel, okay?"

I nodded and watched as he left, Gordon should be here soon. Suddenly, the door flung open and there he stood. My knight in shining armor. Holy fuck. Both of the guards were lying on the ground, is that a cleaver he's holding? Wow, he really would do anything for me...

I run into his arms, trying to contain myself. I take a sniff, he smells like the Himalayas. God, I wish Kermit would smell like something besides pond water. I start to run my hands through his hair, but he stops me. "My wife is a model, I don't want her to see us together. Follow me."

We head out the back entrance, behind us we can hear one of the designers screaming at me. "You can't just leave!" Actually, I can. Nothing will stop two people who are in love. The door slams behind us, and next thing I know we're making out against a dumpster. So romantic.

We hear a moan, but it isn't from either of us. We pull apart, confused. He lifts me up so I can look into the dumpster and I have never been so shocked in my life. Cookie Monster was doing it with Oscar. They didn't even look up when I oinked.  As weird as it was to watch people who I know fuck each other in a dumpster I kind of ship it. I signaled for Gordon to let me down and we went back to making out. I whisper into his ear seductively, "do you want to find another dumpster?"

He nodded, so we walked down the alley looking for a suitable dumpster. Once we found one, we carried a nearby trash can over so we could climb inside.  Luckily, it was mostly just trash bags inside there. "Who would throw away a perfectly functional KitchenAid mixer?" asked Gordon, looking through some of the garbage. "I don't know but I have a feeling someone tonight is gonna get KitchenAIDS."

Gordon looked over at me, a bit disgusted I think. "I will never be able to use a mixer again," he said, shaking his head. I hope he found it at least a little funny, because then I'd be cheating on Kermit for nothing.

POV: Gordon Ramsay

Not only is my beautiful piglet gorgeous, she's funny too. I want to spend my life with her. We sat in the dumpster together for a bit, kind of just looking through the trash bags. Who knew I'd be dumpster diving in Paris with someone who isn't my wife? 

We started talking about our families and the previous events of the night. I was right about her having a husband. This really sucks but I think we'll make it through. We stared up into the midnight sky together, god we're really meant to be. 

She turned and looked at me, whispering, "I love you."

"I love you too," I said back.

why the fuck did I make this lol