Poems of the Unknowing

Hesitation

(Warning, this may trigger a lot of you. This is only what comes to me through my emotions. This contains details about suicide and is by not any means to encourage those going through hard times to kill themselves. You are important, do not kill yourself, I hope this conveys that in some type of way. That being said, don't be a snowflake and read these dark poems only to complain.)

You know,

It's such a sad thing to see people cry.

But they do, whether it be held back....

Or all out. 

Yes we as humans must cry

It is something many of us hate to ever think about doing.

But to me, I think that its fun to cry

Sure, it may leave you exhausted

Or just overall lethargic

Yet it relieves you of all the emotions you had before.

Which is probably why  our body can do it without permission

You can try all you like to not cry

But it's no use, if the feeling is strong enough

And it feels almost physical

You will cry. 

You MUST cry

Its one of the things you can do without hesitation.

Which I find to be fairly cool.

But why is it, that when a person feels that their life is worthless

A meaningless candle flame in the spread of an open prairie. 

Why is is when a human looks towards death as a solution

They hesitate?

Yes it's your brains instinct to make sure you stay alive until you're old and wrinkly

But you never listened to it before...

Did you?

So why listen to it now?

You're making the biggest decision of your life, of course it would make sense to listen to your head

No...

That's wrong.

Every decision you've made up until this point...

Has been massive.

Had you not made that one decision, you wouldn't have met your best friend

Or you may not have met your husband, or your wife

You make this decision to 

End. It.

You will lose everything.

But that's what you want?

No one will care if you die

You won't make the headlines

No one will miss you.

So you say. 

You want that feeling of peace

To finally reach the light at the end of the tunnel

You want to finally climb out of the shit hole that you've been crawling and digging in for ages

You want to finally

Be free

No you don't care about the tears that will fertilize the ground 

Or the blood that may be spilled, because you

Are gone.

Well that some bullshit. 

You want to hesitate on your life that you have endured for so long?

You have made it past death, many times without knowing it

Yet you willingly come to it's call

It's fine, I can't judge you.

I've wanted to close my eyes and follow that sweet voice too

The voice that makes you hallucinate

Drags you in to the depths of despair

Makes you feel like you're a waste of space

An unnecessary breath of air.

Fine then

End it. 

I dare you.

End all the good dreams you've had

End all the nightmares you went through

Erase it all

Clear the whiteboard

You've hesitated long enough.

But let me tell you something

The world doesn't stop for hesitators

It stops for the dead, yes it does.

But not for the living that still have a chance 

Not for us who DON'T hesitate

I refuse to hesitate.

I certainly hope you won't

Because hesitation

Is your worst enemy