Oneshots

The darkest

WARNING! The story is really depressive and contains self-harm. If you can't stand those things do not read this.

~ Lunatic71

Night.The time where everything is in its darkest shade. For Alice the timewhere everything bad comes together - all the insults, all thedisapproval, all the ignorance - just to attack her soul as if shewas the prey for a starved, aggressive pack of wolves. And after thepain there comes numbness - like there was nothing left butemptiness.

Only one question coming up: Am I alive?

The feeling of death replaces the soul.

There was only one way for her to see - to feel- if she was alive.

A tear escaped her eyes while Alice grabbed the knife. Its silver blade reflected he crying figure. She did cry - she always did - but it had become a silent cry; as if even her sadness and despair had become numb.

Her left arm - unclothed - showed many scars already; scars of a never ending war against herself. Tonight there would be fresh cuts.

Alice placed the knife on her arm, followed by slight pressure then a quick pull.While the line of cut slowly gained more presence by the blood emerging from the wound Alice's memories of those hatred looks she got, telling her how none cared about her feelings flashed and a voice as cold as ice said this one line:

Just die already.

A sob escaped her lips.

Her throat ached with every breath she dared to take.

She wanted to scream her pain out but instead there went another cut and another one and another one. With every new cut she put more pressure on the knife. Simply to finally feel something.

After some cuts there was a tickling but more burning sensation. A smile crept on her face; a bitter one. She had found a feeling - so she must be alive. 

Just one more cut and then she put the knife down. Finally crying out loud over the bleeding mess she had created.

"Alice?",a voice trembling from the horror on what the person it belonged to saw.

Instead of answering the woman slowly tilted her head to the voice, her eyes growing wider the more she saw of the man standing in the door frame.

Her mouth formed a word 'No'.

Tears formed in the corner of his eyes while he walked over to her, knelt down and hugged her tight.

"I-I-I'ms-so-sorry", she cried out.

"I do not need you to be sorry. I need you to know that from now on you can call me, visit me or whatever when you're sad! I will listen and I will comfort you! Okay?", he needed all of his strength to speak these sentences.

Alice nodded.

"We will clean this up and then I'll get you a hot chocolate, okay?",he suggested.

"...And you'll hold me?", she she asked with a voice so weak it was barely notable.

"I will. I always will."

Night.The time where everything is in its darkest shade. But also the time before dawn.

AN:

I am so sorry I did  not note when I uploded this seemingly some blanks disappeared when I transfered this from word. I fixed it now. I hope this is never going to happen again.

~ Lunatic71, 20.04.2020