Sad $#!+

texts of December 6th

I hate this cycle where you're left on the banks waiting for someone to rescue you, but instead the waves just wash over you and they keep coming, one after the other. You cant drown because gravity holds you in that place, but the waves just come one after the other and right as you recover from one, you better be ready for that next one. Because oh look-its already consuming us. ---furubalover

I feel so alone. There's this darkness that consumes me. I see no lights, no saving grace. Right when you see this flickering light it shatters to the ground with what was left of my hope. There's nobody to help. Scream all you want, but nobody's there, nobody left to feel what you feel, say what you say. This feeling envelopes me and I'm tired of faking. I'm tired of struggling and I just have to face the facts. This darkness is approaching too fast. I'm already gone. ---baekyeolee

And the first tear falls. There's already a puddle but they don't care about that. The sadness pools into empty cups and the tears are fed to others. Happy others. How are they smiling? How can they be smiling while I'm in the dark? Thats right. They don't see me. I'm just the shadow that consumes the darkness so everyone else can live in the light. A sacrifice. And yet they dont know I sacrifice, or that it's all for them. ---furubalover

This feeling stalks me day and night. I pretend I dont care, I pretend it doesn't bother me. This constant weight on my shoulders has never been lifted, and these days, it feels like its been getting heavier. This feeling isn't or cant be expressed through emotions because mine were shattered with the overbearing weight. This feeling is a predator, and I just lost the battle. ---baekyeolee

There's nothing left to say because in that stormy night, the damage had already been taken. Emotional scars are worse than physical and I fear that perhaps we'll never heal. For we're all broken, so how is one broken soul supposed to say to another "pull through" when they're a broken soul as well? They say an apocalypse is impossible but its already began. And in the worst way, none the less. All of the zombies walk around with masks on and suddenly you can't tell who's infected. Some of the infected will live out their days with no one knowing what's really going on inside. And that thought scares me. ---furubalover