Unknown

Ella presses her fingers to her temples and sighs.

Lately, she's been wondering about something. It's weird. It's confusing. It's wrong. But she doesn't feel like a girl or a boy. If she's neither female nor male, then, well, what is she supposed to be? Who is she (he?) supposed to be? There isn't any gender other than female or male. Ella's definitely not trans, so what is she (he?) supposed to be?

Lying on her (his?) bed, Ella stares up at the ceiling. Glow-in-the-dark stars have been glued there, from when Ella was a child and afraid of the dark. They don't glow anymore, but they're comforting in a way.

She feels lost. He feels lost. Ella doesn't like the way either of those pronouns sound. They feel wrong to her (him?).

Maybe I'm a freak. No one else feels this way. I'm deluding myself. I'm just confused. I'm just-

"Ella! Dinnertime, sweetie!" her (his?) mom calls from downstairs.

"Coming!" Ella calls back. She (he?) gets off of the bed and runs downstairs.

I'll try not to think about it too much, Ella decides. Maybe it's just a phase. Maybe I ate something weird.

But that doesn't erase the ache in her (his?) chest. That doesn't erase the confusion in her (his?) mind.

Wrong, her brain whispers when Ella's mother calls Ella 'a darling little girl', wrong wrong wrong!

Ella shoves that part of her brain deep, deep down. Ella's a girl. Ella's a girl, has always been a girl.

Wrong, her brain whispers but Ella keeps on smiling.

Nothing's wrong.